On Wed, Aug 29, 2012 at 3:04 AM, Simon Osborne <outspaced@xxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Speaking about commas:
<http://projectaon.proboards.com/index.cgi?action=gotopost&board=helpwanted&thread=706&post=38777>
(er) 02fotw 49:
Sails tear, ropes mysteriously untie themselves and timbers warp and leak.
The men become short-tempered in the cramped quarters and fighting, often to
the death, is commonplace.
The first sentence should have a serial comma before 'and'. [tw] writes: "I
would have written "their cramped quarters". A comma before "and fighting"
might also improve readability." I'm not sure about changing 'the' to
'their' (the original seems correct to me), but should there be a comma
before 'and fighting' in view of last week's discussion?
Agreed on the first sentence. Regarding the second, "the" is fine
as-is, and here a couple options for punctuation that I think works:
"The men become short-tempered in the cramped quarters, and fighting —
often to the death — is commonplace."
"The men become short-tempered in the cramped quarters, and fighting,
often to the death, is commonplace."
I prefer the first option. I would have also suggested parentheses,
but Joe rarely seems to use them in these situations, or at least
that's my impression.
