[lit-ideas] Sunday Twofer
- From: David Ritchie <profdritchie@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Sun, 13 Jan 2013 11:08:54 -0800
You may know the T.V. title, "Only Fools and Horses." I'm borrowing it to
describe incidents from the Twofer's recent vacation. Had you ever seen a shin
ripped open by a Blue-Footed Booby's beak, we could begin with that, but
instead I fall back--ha!--on swordly movies. You know the scene moments after
a fight when the hero's attendant whispers, "I'm afraid it's deep." That was
me on Christmas Day, wounding my shin. I was lying flat, looking at the sky,
thanking goodness my head was unscathed, thinking I was in a movie, "Bring on
the rum; one slug for the wound, one for the shock." Hawaiian rock is sharp.
And horses? While I lay for days recovering, I was comforted by gorgeous views
and soft sea breezes. No need for sympathy. And in the next field over were
two of Oprah Winfrey's horses, miniature ones, said to have cost eighty
thousand dollars. They were muzzled by devices. They were on a weight-loss
program.
If instead of "Dad's Army" there'd also been a show called, "Dad's Handy," I'd
have a groaner of a second opening. My father is a Burns man, an Auld Lang
Syne type; at partings he looks you in the eye, sticks out a hand and follows
the song's instruction. I'm not like my sister-in-law-- who dissolves into
tears on all such occasions--and I know that I'm luckier than my forebears at
such moments, but farewells are not joyous occasions, so you'd do well to
remember that "Auld Lang Syne" is actually a sad and sentimental song; "gie's a
hand o' thine" has wobble in. So what's a body to do when parting in the
gloamin, or at Portland International Airport? What Scots expect--just your
best. Then journey home, sing an emboldening song, drink strong tea. (You
expected "whisky"? On a Sunday?)
David Ritchie,
Portland,
Oregon------------------------------------------------------------------
To change your Lit-Ideas settings (subscribe/unsub, vacation on/off,
digest on/off), visit www.andreas.com/faq-lit-ideas.html
Other related posts:
