[lit-ideas] Sunday Twofer

  • From: David Ritchie <ritchierd@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Date: Sun, 27 Nov 2011 11:13:36 -0800

those of you with northern european complexions will be familiar with 
i went to see my dermatologist 
bothered about slight itch and scale
like someone mopping up a pacific battlefield with a flamethrower
she got going with liquid nitrogen
this may sting a bit
she said
then she asked something
i didn't comprehend
i'm not at my best in doctors' offices
she repeated the question
no i said i haven't seen anything there
i never look in a mirror
this is not quite true
i do glance from time to time
and of course shave
but i do not interrogate the image
as art historians and evil queens will do
she dug out a knife
a scalpel
wanted to biop
my the bugger stung
the lie i told myself
is i might have liked the era better
when a leather strap between the teeth 
came with a slug of rum
but had i lived in that era
i'd naturally be dead 
not only from the swift tromp of passing history
but also because legions upon legions of lesions
offed their owners

i wrote to the governor today
to thank him for his courage
i believe he acted as a leader ought
but i agree with him
so my test 
like the death penalty itself
is neither just nor fair

David Ritchie,
Portland, Oregon

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