[projectaon] Re: Errors: Eight from the Cauldron
- From: "Jonathan Blake" <blake.jon@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: projectaon@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Tue, 18 Nov 2008 16:50:33 -0800
On Sun, Nov 16, 2008 at 2:43 AM, Simon Osborne <outspaced@xxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
> Ingo Kloecker wrote:
>>>
>>> (er) 77: He that gave us life -> Him that gave us life [LeRoy
>>> McSwain, Jan 2007] -> "...we will fulfil our duty to He that gave us
>>> life."
>>> [SO: Also, remove quotes and put thought-speech in itals? Or does the
>>> Crocaryx use actual speech later on in the section?]
>>
>> "It is He who [...]" appears to be a very common phrase in particular when
>> talking about a deity. Google finds about 961,000 matches when one searches
>> for the phrase "it is he who".
>
> I can understand the personalisation of "He who" over "He that".
>
>> In view of this, I propose:
>> (er) 77: He that gave us life -> He who gave us life
>
> Yes, I think I'd tend to agree.
I think we're searching for "we will fulfil our duty to Him who gave
us life.". :)
>>> (er) 115: Put a tick on your Action Chart beside the item or items
>>> that you wish to stake. [Change 'Put a tick' to 'Put tick(s)' or
>>> more simply just 'Mark' to agree with the syntax of 'item or items']
>>> [LeRoy McSwain, Jan 2007]
>>
>> If you really think it's necessary to change this then please use "On your
>> Action Chart mark the item or items that you wish to stake." Using 'Put
>> tick(s)' might be okay for a form of some kind, but I don't think it's
>> appropriate for literature.
>
> I like this a lot. Assuming we do this, consider this post another vote for
> Ingo's solution.
Third-ed.
>>> (er) 146: Chah mountain -> Chah Mountain [??]
>>> -> "...tough hill-dwellers from the Chah mountain valley, and..."
>>
>> Chah is a river (see section 1). So "Chah Mountain valley" does not seem
>> to make sense to me. Maybe "Chah Mountain Valley"?
>
> I'd forgotten that. I was going from the idea it referred to a valley in the
> Chah Mountains. Hmm.
I've no idea. It could refer to the "Chah Mtns" on the map, but there
is no such thing as "Chah Mountain" (note the singular) as far as I
know, so I vote for leaving it as is.
>>> (ne) 350 (Footnote) South Gate Guard -> South Gate guards
>>> -> "...if your weapons and weapon-like Special Items were confiscated
>>> by the South Gate Guard, they..."
>>
>> I'd say "South Gate Guard" is correct. The fact that "Guard" is
>> capitalized indicates that it does not refer to a single person but to the
>> entity formed by all guards. Or maybe I'm just making this up since it works
>> that way in German where "Wache" can refer to a single person as well as to
>> the entity formed by several people and even to the building housing the
>> guard.
>
> It's not wrong per se, but ISTR "guards" is used in the book rather than
> "Guard". I could be wrong, though.
Cf. King's Guard in Flight from the Dark section 6.
--
Jon
~~~~~~
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