[projectaon] Re: 21votm errata
- From: Jonathan Blake <blake.jon@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: Project Aon List <projectaon@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Sat, 28 Mar 2009 15:14:37 -0700
(er) 266 [x2], 340, 279 [x2]: weapon -> ? Weapon [LM]
agreed
(er) 268: The crowd roar -> The crowd roars [LM]
agreed
(er) 273: remain legible for thousands -> remain legible, for
thousands [LM] [so: I prefer: symbols yet -> symbols, yet]
Both commas should be present. That "for" is regrettable because of
how it reads with "thousands of years". It could be replaced by a
colon.
(er) 275: leaving harbour -> ? leaving the harbour (or is this idiom?)
[LM]
OK as-is.
(er) 275: [SD: Signpost details to be encoded in small caps.]
Note that this is addressed earlier in the errata list.
(er) 281: the remainder tend -> the remainder tends [LM]
(er) 281: and clear -> and clears [LM]
Both OK as-is.
(er) 282: the learned sage the charge -> the learned sage, the charge [SD]
agreed
(er) 286: crowd immediately lose -> crowd immediately loses [LM]
This is technically OK as-is, but it sounds so awkward to me that I
vote to make the change.
(er) 287: In fading light, -> ? In the fading light (or is this idiom?)
[LM]
OK as-is.
(er) 287: one pair take -> one pair takes [LM]
agreed
(er) 290: disgrace and sometimes death awaits -> ? disgrace and
sometimes death await [LM]
agreed
(er) 290: sparkling waters -> sparkling water [SD: To GM it is
seemingly normal water; hardly Waters of Life, or anything like that]
agreed
(er) 291: leads to this room -> ? leads to a room [LM]
agreed
--
Jon
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