> "Too busy for lasting relationships" is a trope now heard around the > world. It reflects social arrangements common in market-driven > societies where work has become the primary source of identity and > commercial entertainment replaces family and neighborhood. It's pretty catastrophic in Calif. For the Valentine's issue of San Francisco Magazine, there were four articles on dating in SF. SF is widely seen as the most romantic city in the USA (according to polls), yet the reality of dating in SF? Nobody dates anymore. Many friends tell me they've not been on a date in two or three years. SF Magazine did their own polls and found that 50% of men and women don't date anymore. About 50% had not been on a date in two years. 80% of the guys would rather spend the evening with friends than go on a date. In most societies, about 80% of women have children. But in Calif, it's down to 60%. Very soon, women-who-have-children may be a minority. That has serious implications for women's perceptions and expectations of themselves and their roles. The arguments are the same: too busy for relationships, relationships didn't go anywhere, too difficult, and so on. For some people, marriage got in the way of dating. Very few live together anymore. Practically all of my friends are single and they live alone. I know literally only a handful of people who have spouses, and yet fewer who have children with their spouse (and these couples are all in their 50s). Those are outnumbered by the few who have children without an adult companion. Meanwhile, politicians continue to talk about the sanctity of marriage and the family. Like, get a clue! That stuff has no practical meaning to most urban people under 40. yrs, andreas www.andreas.com ------------------------------------------------------------------ To change your Lit-Ideas settings (subscribe/unsub, vacation on/off, digest on/off), visit www.andreas.com/faq-lit-ideas.html