[yshavurah] Re: Bar/Bat Mitzvah rituals
- From: David Seitz <david.seitz@xxxxxxxxxx>
- To: rebiljoj@xxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Tue, 10 Dec 2002 12:22:06 -0500
Okay, Regarding my highly speculative theories about the
American versions of Bar/Bat Mitzvahs, I clearly shot off
too quickly that time. I was trying to imagine this
expansion of ritual (from only the Aliyah to so much more)
from a historical and sociological perspective, but am
guilty of the same brands of generalizations I alert my
students to.
Daniele, always my better half, suggested a notion that
makes greater overall sense for the expansion of these
religious expectations. She wonders if the increase of Torah
reading and commentary expectations for the Bar/Bat Mitzvah
grew in response to the greater assimilation of Jews into
American culture, that it could no longer be expected that a
Jewish child would absorb this religious literacy with out
explicit goals of instruction.
Maybe that was all obvious to all of you, but I appreciate
these insights.
David
Johanna wrote:
>
> I would not totally agree with David that the many of the rituals regarding
> Bar/Bat Mitzvahs are an American symbol of wealth and status, although they
> have certainly become that for many. A pubescent child taking on religious
> rites and obligations are celebrated in many, if not most, cultures in a big
> way, and I think it's appropriate. After all, our children, who learn to
> read from the Torah (a significant feat in itself), conduct a service, write
> a d'var Torah, and in many cases, develop and execute a mitzvah project;
> have accomplished a lot---a whole lot!
>
> That accomplishment, and "coming of age" is to be celebrated! It's a
> wonderful time for nachas for parents, grandparents, extended family and
> community.
>
> Having said that, a Bar Mitzvah is NOT a party, as I've seen many people
> assume. Even kids in the throws of preparing for their event look at it as
> a means to an end---the end being the big party and presents. I think that
> book that was published a number of years ago, "Putting G-d on the Guest
> List," addresses this issue well, and I know it is required reading in many
> congregations for parents planning B Mitzvah.
>
> So, like most things, this is a matter of degree and intention. If your
> intention is to show how rich and powerful you are, then, of course, some
> will be impressed, but most will recognize you are showing off (which of
> course you are). If you intention is to celebrate a wonderful event in your
> child's life, and your own, based on whatever your means might be, then,
> hey, go for it! :-)
>
> Just my 2 cents!
>
> Johanna
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