Nice to see a smaller list... :-)
On 10/04/2015 00:21, Jonathan Blake wrote:
This is what I found:
208: approach El Paso from the west -> approach El Paso from the east
(jb: surely?)
291: the Angelinos came -> the Angelinos were heading (jb: cf. 66, 90,
99, 101)
296: road, so that -> road so that
350 when you left Big Spring one week ago. -> when you left Big Spring
eight days ago.
On Wed, 8 Apr 2015 at 14:37 Simon Osborne <outspaced@xxxxxxxxxxxx
<mailto:outspaced@xxxxxxxxxxxx>> wrote:
OK, most of these dealt with, just the following left:
On 08/04/2015 19:02, Jonathan Blake wrote:
> > I've been using "Deleted xxx" in the Errata entries for the
books. I
> noticed
> > that according to the MoS it should be "Removed xxx" instead.
> > <http://www.projectaon.org/en/__Sanctum/ManualOfStyle
<http://www.projectaon.org/en/Sanctum/ManualOfStyle>> I can fix this
> across
> > the books if required.
>
> I guess I started doing it that way and put it in the manual of style
> because "deleted" seemed too tech-speak for this context. That's
really
> a personal preference, so I'm willing to be argued out of it. :)
It's a pretty straightforward find/replace across files, so I can get
that done easily. Will look at it as soon as I've finished writing
this. ;-)
...Done!
> > (ne) 80: Ammo Pouch record [so: link to Action Chart]
>
> That's a great point, but that's going to apply in a lot of place
in the
> books. I think we should do it.
I've made Ammo Pouch link to the Action Chart when you are told you
alter its contents; BIG changes across all 4 books...
> > (er) 120: [Add: "(Erase the Leviathan Missile from your Action
Chart.
> > Remember to restore 2 Stealth Points now you are no longer
encumbered with
> > this item.)" Or something similar (cf. query on 328 below). ]
>
> agree
In view of the Signal Flare deletion as well, the wording was adapted
here, but implemented.
> > (er) 241: doorway—the rifleman and one other—armed with a ->
doorway—the
> > rifleman, and one other armed with a
>
> In the XML, we have it as "Two more men in uniform emerge from the
> doorway—the rifleman and one other, armed with a sawn-off
shotgun." Is
> this the original? That seems to work to me.
No. The original reads:
"Two more men in uniform emerge from the doorway—the rifleman and one
other—armed with a sawn-off shotgun."
I've implemented your wording above, though it still seems a little
ambiguous to me. Maybe "...and one other, who is armed with..."?
> > 328: The Leviathan is a Backpack Item (cf. Section 345). Is the -2
> Stealth
> > penalty an additional -2 on top of the other penalties if it
is Item
> 4, Item
> > 7, or Item 10? Or does it give a flat -2 penalty to Stealth
regardless of
> > how much else is being carried?
>
> Good question. I think the -2 penalty is independent of and added to
> other stealth penalties, but that's just my reading of it. It may be
> worth a footnote but we really don't have much to say aside from
telling
> the reader to make their best guess.
Footnote added: "This Stealth penalty is probably in addition to the
penalty for carrying more than 3 Backpack Items (e.g. if the Leviathan
Missile is your fourth Backpack Item, you incur a 3-point penalty rather
than just 2). Alternatively, you may read it to mean that the Leviathan
Missile gives a 2-point penalty irrespective of how many other Backpack
Items you are carrying."
For completeness, the wording for the "alt-text" to the puzzle in
Section 129 still needs to be written and added.
--
Simon Osborne
Project Aon
