[audio-pals] Re: Facebook Trend
- From: "Josh" <lawdog911@xxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: <audio-pals@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Tue, 17 Mar 2015 10:30:23 -0400
I agree with you and I do not think they have said anything to them at this
point. I think my Mom has just herd us talk of the obstacles we have
encountered and instead of stirring the pot she just tries to avoid it. So, I
do not think the problem lies with Amanda’s family this time, but rather the
perceived friction that may occur based on past situations. On a more positive
note, I received my first indication of the upcoming graduation yesterday. I
got my class ring that I ordered back a day before my birthday. My Dad and Mom
paid a portion of it and counted that as a birthday/ graduation gift and I paid
the rest. Amanda’s ring should arrive by at least the first of next month if
not then the middle of next month.
From: audio-pals-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx [mailto:audio-pals-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx]
On Behalf Of Thomas McMahan
Sent: Tuesday, March 17, 2015 10:07 AM
To: audio-pals@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: [audio-pals] Re: Facebook Trend
Well if his biologicals dropped the ball, which they did, that’s their problem.
What will thhey do when he’s in his 20s and still calls you all what he calls
you? There’s absolutely nothing they can do about it. Better to try to
rebuild bridges than continuing to tear them down, but if thats their choice
that they make, they get to live with consequences.
People aren’t property, that war has been fought in this Country already and
decided. He lives with you, you have legal custody, he can choose to call you
what he wishes as long as it’s agreeable to you, there’s little they can do
about it, it just shows the caliber of people they are I guess. They actually
should be proud of what he’s doing instead of sniping. The time for that is
long over, it’s not productive.
On Mar 17, 2015, at 8:55 AM, Josh <lawdog911@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Well, as most of you all know my son is biologically my nephew on my wife’s
side. Without going into a big long drawn out story his Mom cared more about
herself than she did him or his sister. So, needless to say this lack of care
lead to the state getting involved. My wife’s sister tried to keep us from
getting him, but we kept fighting and going around her to get information best
we could. Finally, the state quit looking at the worthless father and let us in
on more of what was going on. One thing lead to another and we now have
permanent custody of our son. Once we got pc the shift took place. He started
calling us Dad and Mom which he could do even when we just had temporary
custody, but we did not force him at anytime to call us Dad and Mom. When we
had temporary custody he would sneak around and call us Dad and Mom to his
friends and stuff, but it was not till we got permanent custody that he started
calling us Dad and Mom to our faces. We have done our best to explain to him
the differences between Mother and Mom and Father and Dad and that a Mother and
Father can be a Mom and a Dad, but a Dad and Mom does not always have to be a
Father and Mother. Well, anyways this is some background. We have faced some
obstacles along the way mostly on Amanda’s side, but now there is one starting
to form on my side with my parents.
Our son calls my Dad and Mom Pops and Gram and they see him as their
grandson. So, here is where the problem arises. Amanda posts things regarding
his progress all the time. The most recent thing that she has posted is his
progress report which shows him reading on an 8th grade level. He is in the
third grade as some of you all may remember me mentioning in my introduction.
My Mom was the first one to post and commented about that is our boy or
something to that effect. However, I then seen where biological family members
posted and my Mom’s comment has been removed. I know why my Mom removed it
because she has mentioned in the past not wanting to cause waves, but I do not
think this is right especially given all they do for him. She has asked me
about pictures she has posted with them in the picture with Little Man. In my
personal opinion if they have a problem then it is not with the fact that my
parents are doing things with him, it is an internal problem that they need to
work out with themselves. Ok, I am through getting this off my chest now. I do
not know if I posted or not, but in January we closed our home for foster kids.
Once we get a house that is bigger and they can have a different room than
Little Man’s we will consider reopening. When we started the process to get
Little Man we also went thorugh the process as one of the requirements to
become foster parents. We had to take the training, but did not necessarily
have to get the home study done, but we figured if we are going this far with
it then we should go ahead and go the whole way in case we wanted to take in
foster kids. We knew that in our current living situation taking in foster kids
was not a possibility mainly because Little Man did not want to share his room
and we were not going to make him.
So, I have emailed Amanda and suggested that she talk to my Mom because this
is not a situation that they should feel awkward in. If anything the one that
created the shift is the one that should feel awkward for creating the
situation that has caused the shift. Little Man calls me Dad and my parents are
my parents so therefore that does make them a set of his grandparents. He calls
them Pops and Gram and again if he sees them as his grandparent then that is
all that matters and who cares what people think of it. Okay, well I have to go
and ponder this a while and see if I can come up with some sort of solution.
One of the grandmothers that posted a comment coddles the biological mother so
this may be some of the problem.
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