[lit-ideas] Re: Slang

  • From: David Ritchie <ritchierd@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: <lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • Date: Wed, 02 Jun 2004 18:05:09 -0700

on 6/2/04 2:17 PM, Judy Evans at judithevans001@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx wrote:

I waa pear-shaped, am
> now apple.

The court of World Opinion--which is technically recessed at
present--resolutely suggests that you and another lady are guilty of
provoking verse:

Jane, An Old Campaigner, Just Turned Seventy Five.

I once was a belle.
You'd never tell now.
After a while, I became merely bell-shaped,
which was all very well,
but now I've come around to this;
I whirl and twirl in my late days,
like an apple.

Some people seem to think I'm the one that rots the barrel.
If looks really  meant anything, they'd have a point.
There's this loose skin,
and I can't see a thing,
and I keep saying, "say what?"
It's the pits.

But, on the bright side, I'm no longer cooking,
I hated cooking,
and I'm wearing-- you know the book--
bold purples,
oh, and big hats.
I look terrible, but it's fun.

I really not a barrel rotter,
I'm a barrel rotter's mate...
No, I'm sound as a ship with a good bottom,
well not really, but time is short...
so I speak up, I speak out, I go out,
mostly to eat, with Mike.
I start with dessert.
What the heck.

You might say that at this age
I'm gravitas-less in Gaza.
Free as a bum, I wander in parks and plazas,
enjoying the air and picking daisies.

Here's what just occurred to me.
If, in fact, the green grass, showing through all that rippling dapple,
is really every color *except* green,
then maybe the shape of me I see in the glass--
when I can stand to look--
is not really apple at all,
but just looks sufficiently that way,
to keep the doctors at bay.

I'll take it.

David Ritchie
Portland, Oregon

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