[ SHOWGSD-L ] Reminder in Saying Goodbye
- From: "David Fritsche" <d_fritsche@xxxxxxxxxx>
- To: <kathy@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>, <showgsd-l@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Fri, 29 Aug 2014 14:39:23 -0700
The length of grief cannot be determined... We
grieve, for a time, yet we grieve for the rest of
our lives. And it accumulates....
A loss is a loss, not for a day or a week, but
forever!
It is well to move on and to allow the fond
memories to bring a smile, rather than pain, yet,
there are times, when we least expect it, that
some trigger move us back to the pain. This is the
price we pay for love, and it is worth it.. For if
we are not giving places for love to employ, we
are not living.
Blessing to you and your husband. You are
certainly part of the animal lovers club.
Dave
-----Original Message-----
From: showgsd-l-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
[mailto:showgsd-l-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx] On Behalf
Of Kathy Partch
Sent: Friday, August 29, 2014 2:04 PM
To: showgsd-l@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: [ SHOWGSD-L ] Reminder in Saying Goodbye
Saying goodbye to anything is heart-wrenching.
Yes. And saying goodbye to an animal of any kind
is never easy. I've been through this a number of
times as the many of you have as well. I've
witnessed more of the most painful broken hearts
in the loss of an animal than some losing a family
member or friend. Some of us can be just that way
towards that certain animal. Why does a heart turn
that way? My husband has been one of them. He
grieved so hard after he lost his last GSD that
often to this day he still reminds me: "I'll never
want to hurt like that again!" We have often
talked about this kind of pain. He said he felt
guilty he didn't have those feelings for the loss
of his mother, father, etc., when they passed.
What makes different heart-connections like this
happen when we bond so tightly with an animal? Do
we hold some kind of spiritual bond with them? A
bond so strong we become one spirit? I know a guy
that just lost his horse. His grieving was so
powerful he didn't think he could go on living. He
wrote about his pain. It was so touching I'll
never forget his words. How terrifying and sad to
hear. But after some time he did move on which was
relieving to hear. But for my husband, he never
did get another dog because of this incredible
pain that still seems like yesterday. In other
words, I feel he has continued to suffer because
he has now lost precious days given to him that
could've been given to another dog. And the loss
for that that dog whoever may have been. But I
can't make those decisions for others. To watch
such pain at that time when my husband said
goodbye to his shepherd was just horrible. I think
the most of you or all know what I'm talking
about. Kathy Partch
<http://www.jokaysedona.com/> www.JoKaySedona.com
I'm sharing this information only as a reminder to
our selves: Living with a pet means friendship,
responsibility and forming a loving bond that can
last a lifetime.
The sad truth is that many owners outlive their
companion animals, forcing them to begin a
difficult grieving process not everyone
acknowledges or understands. "Whether an animal
dies, is lost or stolen or must be placed in a new
home, sorrow is a normal and natural reaction to
the loss of a beloved friend," according to the
Twin Cities-based Animal Humane Society. "But our
culture doesn't provide us with the rituals to
help us mourn the loss of a companion animal as it
does the loss of a human."
Like any grieving process, mourning for a pet is a
deeply personal experience that will be felt
differently depending on the individual, said Dr.
Jennifer Scott, a veterinarian at a Veterinary
Clinic in MN. "There's no right way to do it,"
said Scott, who tells clients that it's OK to feel
sad after a pet is put down. She said one of the
best things for grieving pet owners is to draw on
family members and support networks for help.
Parents and children: The issue can be especially
difficult with children, for whom the death of a
pet may be their first experience with mortality.
Scott's advice for parents broaching the subject
depends on the age of the child, but typically
includes holding a memorial, be it planting a tree
or drawing a picture - anything to acknowledge the
child's feelings. Parents should not hide their
sadness or say that a dead pet has simply run off,
as it can cause children to feel betrayed when
they learn the truth, according to the Humane
Society of the United States. Expressing grief in
front of children can help assure them that their
sadness is an acceptable reaction.
In place of a backyard burial, our Family Funeral
Home where I live in MN offers private cremation
services for pets. Animals are cremated alone and
returned to owners in an urn for memorializing.
Another reaction by grieving pet owners may be to
immediately replace it with a new animal. Scott
said that can work for some people, but suggests
giving it time before making a new commitment. "I
usually tell people to listen to their inner voice
on that one," she said, "because sometimes if you
get a pet too soon you end up resenting it if it
has different needs, or you'll compare that pet to
the old one."
A big day: Scott has 10 years of experience in the
veterinary field, including providing euthanasia
services. She also has experience with it in her
personal life, having done the procedure on her
own pets. "It was one of the things I almost
didn't go to vet school over because I didn't
think I could do it," Scott said on the prospect
of ending the life of an animal.
It's never an easy decision to make, she said, but
it can help to look at it from the perspective
that putting down a pet is often the humane thing
to do. "It's kind of a gift we have that we can
help end their suffering,"
Scott said, adding that she's gotten more thank
you notes from owners of pets she's put down than
those she's healed. "Which is odd, but it shows
how big a deal it is for them when they come in
for that appointment," she said.
"You don't remember all the vaccine visits, but
you remember that last day."
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POST is Copyrighted 2014. All material remains the property of the original
author and of GSD Communication, Inc. NO REPRODUCTIONS or FORWARDS of any kind
are permitted without prior permission of the original author AND of the
Showgsd-l Management. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
Each Author is responsible for the content of his/her post. This group and its
administrators are not responsible for the comments or opinions expressed in
any post.
ALL PERSONS ARE ON NOTICE THAT THE FORWARDING, REPRODUCTION OR USE IN ANY
MANNER OF ANY MATERIAL WHICH APPEARS ON SHOWGSD-L WITHOUT THE EXPRESS
PERMISSION OF ALL PARTIES TO THE POST AND THE LIST MANAGEMENT IS EXPRESSLY
FORBIDDEN, AND IS A VIOLATION OF LAW. VIOLATORS OF THIS PROHIBITION WILL BE
PROSECUTED.
For assistance, please contact the List Management at admin@xxxxxxxxxxx
VISIT OUR WEBSITE - http://showgsd.org SUBSCRIPTION:
http://showgsd.org/mail.html
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