[lit-ideas] Re: If you can't beat 'em ...

  • From: "Andy Amago" <aamago@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Date: Tue, 3 Oct 2006 17:46:55 -0400

This isn't too much of a stretch from the plan they invaded Iraq with. 
Woodward called it like a game of pickup basketball, with the same or
higher level of violence than you're proposing, what with Iraqi beaters and
the many millions of tons of bombs they dropped on the population, killing
an awful lot of civilians along the way.  Likewise we had/have our
contracts (fatwas) on all the al Qaeda leaders that we grew.  Woodward says
that if it wasn't so tragic it would be straight out of Saturday Night
Live.  The only thing they're missing is the walruses.  What the heck.  No
walruses?  Flowers will do instead.  Certainly armor and military equipment
was not on the list.  Maybe that's where the snowblowers come in ...

> [Original Message]
> From: Eric Yost <eyost1132@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
> To: <lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
> Date: 10/3/2006 1:56:38 PM
> Subject: [lit-ideas] If you can't beat 'em ... 
> Maybe the best response to bombers and Pope-mad plane 
> hijackers is not to (a) intervene militarily or (b) isolate 
> them until modernity catches up with them? Maybe the best 
> response is a quid pro quo?
> We should start training martyrs. Certainly we have enough 
> heroin addicts to train as martyrs in exchange for a fix. If 
> not we can use robots.
> One suicide mission worth considering is piloting a 767 full 
> of snowblowers and walruses directly into the Kaaba in Mecca 
> during the Haj. Wait until it's really full, as the 9/11 
> guys did, and then bang! (The snowblowers and walruses would 
> add exotic debris to the scene.)
> Governors and local mayors should have the ability to enact 
> their own fatwas against Muslim misbehavior. They should 
> also be encouraged to seek out and use weapons of mass 
> destruction. Get some priest to say it's okay, and you have 
> all the religious justification you need.
> And of course we have a lot of bombs over there. We should 
> use these indiscriminately on the general populations. Just 
> spin a wheel of chance and hit the winner. Televise it too.
> This is exactly the kind of behavior that should please the 
> "moral equivalence" crowd. In fact let's go out of our way 
> to establish that point. Following every terrorist incident, 
> we could air-drop leaflets proclaiming, "That's right. We're 
> no better than you are, just better armed."
> After a lot of jaw-dropping global disgust and horror, many 
> would yearn for the gentle days of Bush-Cheney.
> Well okay, maybe not ...
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