[sparkscoffee] Re: David Letterman - Why I Vote Democrat
- From: Dry Turtles <dryturtles@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: sparkscoffee@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Thu, 1 May 2014 07:21:16 -0700
The reason it's not funny is because it takes intelligence to be funny.[?]
Humor ability reveals intelligence, predicts mating success,
http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0160289611000523
How do you manage to get fired the first day in a Winnie the Pooh costume?
By putting your costume pants on backwards!
Scotty
On Thu, May 1, 2014 at 6:25 AM, Richard Freedland
<richardfl@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx>wrote:
> Here we go again. This is not in any way attributable to David Letterman.
> It's a satirical take-off (and not a very funny one at that) of a David
> Letterman-style Top 10 list. Why not have the subject line read "Ron
> Ristad - Why I Vote Democratic"? It would have exactly the same degree of
> authenticity and it wouldn't be any less humorous.
>
> Back to the Ignore List for you-know-who.
>
> 73,
>
> Richard Freedland
> Miami
>
> Sent from my iPad.
>
> On May 1, 2014, at 8:35 AM, Ron Ristad <ristad@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
>
>
> *#10. I vote Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry
> whatever I want. I've decided to marry my German Shepherd.*
>
>
>
> *#9. I vote Democrat because I believe oil companies' profits of 4% on a
> gallon of gas are obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon at 15%
> isn't. *
>
>
>
> *#8. I vote Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job
> of spending the money I earn than I would. *
>
>
>
> *#7. I vote Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine as long as nobody
> is offended by it. *
>
>
> *#6. I vote Democrat because I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I
> know that my local police are all I need to protect me from murderers and
> thieves.*
>
>
>
> *I am also thankful that we have a 911 service that get police to your
> home in order to identify your body after a home invasion. *
>
>
>
> *#5. I vote Democrat because I'm not concerned about millions of babies
> being aborted so long as we keep all death row inmates alive and comfy and
> get sex change operations if they want one on the tax payers dime. *
>
>
> *#4. I vote Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to free
> health care, education, and Social Security benefits, and we should take
> away Social Security from those who paid into it.*
>
>
>
> *#3. I vote Democrat because I believe that businesses should not be
> allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give
> the rest away to the government for redistribution as the Democrat Party
> sees fit. *
>
>
> *#2. I vote Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite the
> Constitution every few days to suit fringe kooks who would never get their
> agendas past the voters.*
>
>
> *#1. And, the #1 reason I vote Democrat is:*
>
>
> *because I think it's better to pay billions of U. S. dollars for oil to
> people who hate us, but not drill our own because it might upset some
> endangered beetle, gopher or fish here in America. We don't care about the
> beetles, gophers or fish in those other countries. *
>
>
> ....
>
>
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