[ourlunchgroup] Re: Don't mess with kids!
- From: Jacey Erickson <jaceysdragons@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: "ourlunchgroup@xxxxxxxxxxxxx" <ourlunchgroup@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Sat, 17 Dec 2011 06:59:03 -0800 (PST)
ha ha! those are awesome! hey daniel, do you want a ride to the NHS thing
today? becuase i can give you one, i'll pick you up at like a quarter to ten...
is that ok?
~jacey~
________________________________
From: Jarom Denton <smileybob234@xxxxxxxxx>
To: Group of Friends <ourlunchgroup@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Sent: Friday, December 16, 2011 5:15 PM
Subject: [ourlunchgroup] Don't mess with kids!
I found these funny jokes, so I wanted to share :)
1. little girl: was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher: said it
was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it
was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl: stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the
teacher: reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically
impossible. The little girl: said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The
teacher: asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl: replied, "Then you ask him".
2. A Kindergarten teacher: was observing her classroom of children while they
were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As
she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the
drawing was. The girl: replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher: paused and
said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or
looking up from her drawing, the girl: replied, "They will in a minute."
3. A Sunday school teacher: was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five
and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and
thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our
brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy: (the oldest of a
family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."
4. One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at
the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of
white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her
mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?" Her
mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry
or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white." The little girl thought about this
revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs
are white?"
5. The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to
persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it
will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer,
she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.' A small voice at the back
of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, She's dead."
6. A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to
make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the
blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.."
"Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the
ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted,
"Cause your feet ain't empty."
7. The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school
for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a
note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching." Moving
further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of
chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is
watching the apples.
--
Jarom
Other related posts:
