[haiku-web] Re: first changes to getting involved page
- From: "Urias McCullough" <umccullough@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: haiku-web@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Sat, 26 Jul 2008 08:51:14 -0700
2008/7/26 Dennis d'Entremont <dennis.dentremont@xxxxxxxxx>:
> I`ve drafted a document with some changes to the getting involved page
> (http://www.haiku-os.org/getting_involved_in_haiku). It`s in Open Document
> format and would like some comments as to whether or not these first changes
> are ok. They are just minor but once I get a better idea of what the web
> team wants I`ll be able to make some more changes to either this page or
> other areas of the site that need updating.
Thanks :) - the changes are good.
"rapidly" is misspelled
I think maybe the "Create Awareness" section under business sounds a
bit redundant - maybe we could change it to just "Marketing - ..." or
something, with some slightly different wording that is more
business-oriented.
just scanning through, I see a couple more changes that would be nice.
First, we should try to keep it gender-neutral (i know, most people
don't care about this sort of thing, but it doesn't hurt):
"having much in his wallet." should be "having much in their wallet."
"of someone he knows." should be "of someone they know."
etc.
I also see some grammar issues elsewhere:
"someone to be a sizable help Haiku without having to do much" --
missing a "to" there I think
Can you give it a couple of further scans for other similar errors?
Also feel free to change any wording that doesn't sound right, or
doesn't flow well.
Thanks,
Urias
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