[ussgeorgetown] Sharing Pain by Vincent Aigremont & Jassa Kost
- From: TKilyle@xxxxxxx
- To: ussgeorgetown@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Sun, 17 Jul 2005 08:30:24 EDT
Sharing Pain
by Vincent Aigremont & Jassa Kost
When Jassa stepped inside the Ten Forward lounge, she stopped, simply to
admire the view. Even docked as they were at Deep Space Nine, it was lovely.
The chief was right. If I'm going to work, it may as well be with a good
view. Something else to distract me from wanting to call Torias.
"What can I get you, Mr. Kost?" the bartender asked.
"Today? Something indulgent that will make me feel like I'm being served
the nectar of whatever gods abound," Jassa said wistfully.
Lifting his head, Vincent smiled blearily at the newcomer as he raised his
brandy glass. "Cognac," he said cheerfully. "If warmed and sipped, it goes
down like honey. Here, barman, mon ami, bring us both a cognac."
With a slight nod of his head, the barman smiled ruefully. "Don't you think
you've had enough for tonight, Mr Aigremont?" he said playfully.
"Non, on a day like today one can never have enough to drink. When the
whole universe crashes down around your ears, there is never enough alcohol to
smother the pain." Swirling the dregs of his drink, Vincent let it slide into
his mouth, feeling it tingle down his throat. "Vincent Aigremont," he said
to Jassa, offering his hand, "The once happily married and comfortable, now
merely Sergeant Major."
Jassa always found Human hands to be rather warm. This man's was no
exception. She also found him to be rather drunk but she supposed she could
understand that. She'd thought about it herself. Still, she shook his hand
and
said, "Jassa Kost, the Petty Officer Second Class, who's un-Joined and wants
to
stay that way." She gave the barman a shrug. "I'll try what he's having."
Setting a rounded glass in front of each of them, the barman stepped away
and moved off to serve someone else.
"Salut," Vincent said as he raised his glass and sipped. "Un-Joined? I
cannot say that I blame you, I would not want to share my body with another
nor
my mind and soul. The torture that my life is at the moment I would not
inflict upon another."
Jassa took a cautious sip of the cognac, having never tried it before. It
was strong, smoky, and, as the man said, it went down like honey. She set her
elbow down on the bar and propped her chin on her upraised hand. "Yeah,
well...there are certain people out there who think you aren't worth any sort
of
joining if you aren't Joined," she grumbled as she took another sip. "They
lead you on, they make you promises..."
"They say that they love you, they share your world for so long that you are
no longer sure where they end and you begin and then... one day they say
that you don't support them, that you know nothing of love, that the only
things that matters are their own sacrifices." Vincent glared into his glass.
"As if you have made no sacrifices, as if the only pain is theirs, the only
grief and the only opinion that matters in the whole Galaxy."
Jassa took another slow sip. "You know what the problem is with certain
Joined people? They think they're better than us un-Joined. As if we were
some
sort of second class citizens," she grumbled. Dark blue eyes flashed at her
drinking companion. He looked as miserable as she felt. "Self centered,
cold hearted...the lot of them..."
Looking over at her, he smiled warmly for the first time in what felt like
years. "There are too many people like that, mon amie, far too many. They
hate, they resent and they are bitter. It matters not how much we love them,
all they care about is how twisted they have become. They wish to inflict
their own pain on the rest of the world just to make themselves feel
something."
Slowly and with total clarity, it hit him like a ton of bricks. "They feel
nothing," he said with shocked awe, "but their own self-pity, which is why
they cause pain in others."
Jassa took another sip of the cognac, glad that she didn't have to worry
about how it might affect a symbiont. If she was getting lightheaded, it was
just her being affected. She looked at him speculatively, considering what
he'd said. Handsome, she thought. She took note of the graying hair and
recalled what he'd said. He had to have been together with the woman a very
long
time. "Here I am whining about me but you must have been dealing with this
longer. I'm sorry."
"Why are you apologising, mon amie? Pain is pain, no matter how long we
carry it." Slipping off the stool, Vincent pointed himself in the direction
of
a table near the back of the Lounge. "I have no wish to share my problems
with the masses. Will you join me somewhere more secluded?"
Jassa stood up slowly. Alcohol didn't usually go to her head very quickly
but she couldn't say if that was going to happen in this case, considering her
emotional turmoil. "Lead the way. If I'm going to rant and cry, I may as
well not do it in front of everybody," she said resignedly.
Vincent shook his head very, very slowly, trying to keep it from toppling
off. "Whoever this person is, they have no right to make such a beautiful
woman cry," he said in complete seriousness. "Nom de Dieu de bordel de merde!
Who is this person?" he growled.
"Torias Tel, formerly known as Torias Erdeen," Jassa muttered. Even now,
the name sounded like a vile curse. She looked up at Vincent, her hand still
holding the cognac glass. "We've known each other since we were five years
old. He knew I was never interested in being Joined but I guess he made all
these plans and kept them from me. Never said a damned thing about any of the
plans we made, just nodded and agreed and did whatever he wanted." Don't cry
now, you idiot. Don't do it.
"What a fool," he whispered as he considered the woman in front of him.
"Men like that are not worth the effort of tears, petite. Selfish people
rarely
are and yet they are the ones that we cry for most often. They eat at us,
suck away all our resources and then spit them back in our faces when we are
no longer useful to them or we don't fit their plans anymore."
Jassa sat rather heavily at one of the tables and looked up him. Everything
he was saying was completely true. Hesitantly, she asked, "Your wife is the
one who made Chief Ecitsuj so mad, isn't she?"
"Oui," he said with resignation. "I'm sorry for that, I'm sorry for many
things that she has done." He rose slowly, the volume of alcohol he'd drank
swaying him on his feet. "I can understand that you will not wish to drink
with me now that you have worked that out."
One small cool hand reached out to touch his wrist. "Wait! I didn't say
anything of the sort. It isn't your fault at all, Vincent," Jassa said
quietly, her dark blue eyes shining. "It's a pleasant change to talk to a man
who
isn't so egomaniacal. That he's so easy on the eyes and easy on the ears is a
definite plus." She cringed at her own words. Jassa, you have had way too
much to drink.
The smile that lit Vincent's face made his deep brown eyes glow. He flopped
back down, slipping his own hand over hers. "Then let us speak of more
cheerful things. How do you know Chief Ecitsuj? He and my Lieutenant are so
lovely together, don't you think?"
"He's my boss and not a bad one, at that," Jassa replied. Her pulse skipped
a beat. The man is drunk, that's for sure, but he's in complete control of
himself. Those eyes are so deep...She shook herself mentally and added,
"They're adorable, aren't they? Lieutenant McKay can be a little...hard to
deal
with sometimes but she makes him happy so that's alright."
"There are ways and means for dealing with the Lieutenant. It has taken me
some time to work these out, many mistakes were made, injuries to pride and,"
he coughed lightly as he rubbed a line around his throat warily, "body. But
I would like to think that we have an understanding now." He began to rub
small circles around the top of her hand, wincing when his rough fingers
snagged on her soft skin but unwilling to let her go. With a little humour,
he
added, "She understands that I am good at my job and I understand not to wake
her from her sleep walking without full body armor."
Jassa felt a giggle, something that hadn't happened in a very long time.
His hands were certainly larger than hers and warmer. Usually she found Human
hands to be too hot but his were comforting. Strong. She let her fingers
catch at his. "So long as she didn't hurt you permanently. You should see
her
and the chief if they argue. It's almost funny because then they work it
out and they're still just as cute."
"And that is why they will work well in the long run, why they will last.
To argue but not hold a grudge is a fine thing," Vincent said, losing himself
in Jassa's eyes. He lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it gently.
Suddenly, he dropped it and sat back. "Mon Dieu, I am sorry. I don't know
what's happening to me." I love my wife, I love my wife, I love my wife, I...
don't I? On impulse alone, he took her hand again and looked earnestly into
her eyes. "Forgive me?"
Jassa felt her face flushed at the kiss, knowing her spots had to be
standing out very starkly. She felt her fingers wrap around his again as she
let
her dancing eyes settle on his. "For that? No, I don't think so. You've done
nothing to offend me."
"You are so beautiful," he murmured. "You glow like a May morning." He
leaned forward, using his free hand to lift her chin closer to him as he
kissed
her, the alcohol in his blood making him bold. She tastes so fine, he
thought.
At first, Jassa froze, shocked that he'd even think about it. In a matter
of seconds, she ran through 'he's married, you idiot', 'damn but he really is
a fine looking man', to 'please don't stop'. In that short time, she found
herself gently returning the kiss, her hand reaching to touch his face.
The kiss was long, sweet and soothing. Vincent sighed as he sat back, still
playing lightly with her hand. As he gazed down at himself, a spark of
embarrassment made him run a self-conscious hand over his stubbled face. "I
am a
mess, I'm sorry, I've not been able to change my uniform or clean. My God,
I must smell like a pig."
"No, just like old, bad coffee, which is a serious offense to the java
gods," Jassa said brightly. Her hand played over the graying stubble,
enjoying
the warmth of the skin beneath it. "It tickles but it makes you look
rakish...like a hero from an old time 2D movie."
"OH! But I can't offend the great gods of coffee," he laughed as he kissed
her again, deeper this time, his passion growing. "How would you recommend
that I appease them?"
It was, she thought, a good thing she was sitting down because her knees
would have weakened at the kiss. Her face was still close to his, barely a
breath away. True, he did smell of old coffee but he also smelled of warm
cognac
and something cool and spicy. The intensity of the passion of his eyes was
palpable, making her want to do nothing more than tell him to never stop.
"Vincent," she said, her voice soft and low, "I would hate to suggest
something
that you're regret later on. You're too fine a man to have that happen to
you."
"Oui," he breathed sadly. Reaching out, he brushed his knuckles over her
soft, smooth cheek before kissing her softly for a third time. "You're right,
of course. I just wish... I wish I could simply be someone to go home with
you, to spend all night making love to you." Kissing her again, he lingered
over it, stroking her face and hair. "I wish you would let me."
It wasn't the cognac. It was him and she knew it. "Vincent...I'm on duty
in three hours. If I knew you'd be there when I got off duty...." She sounded
a touch wistful. She didn't think she had the right to want to have him to
herself so quickly. "If I didn't promise the chief I'd work on this
information..."
"I'll be there, ma petite, if you'll have me," he smiled shyly. Glancing at
the PADD she was studying with curiosity, he asked, "What are you studying,
if I may ask?"
Jassa's face flushed again under his gaze. How could she turn him out just
like that? He's...what a gentleman. And he's so handsome. "Of course, I'll
have you," she said softly. Please don't change your mind before then.
Flustered at her own boldness, she cleared her throat and tapped the PADD with
one slender finger. "I don't know where he got it but it's information on the
G'Tal's transporters and those personal shields they have. He wants to see
if we can shore up our own defenses with it."
"May I help you?" he said quietly. "Although, in my current state, I am no
good to anyone."
Jassa beamed at his offer of help. It was perfect! She knew he was a
forensic scientist, usually given to examining formerly living things, but
that
sort of scientist was also good at examining other types of evidence. She
kissed his cheek, wrinkling her nose at the scratchiness. "I think that would
be
wonderful, Vincent! You'll have a different view of it than I will. It'll
be perfect," she said, her voice bright. Happy with his offer and just plain
happy to be near him, she reached over and hugged him. "Now why would you
say you're of no good to anyone?"
"Look at me," he said with shame. "I am drunk, I smell, my clothes are a
wreck and I haven't had a good night's sleep since Elspeth threw me out." He
chuckled quietly. "I've been sleeping on a roll mat in the Science labs," he
admitted.
Jassa squeezed his hand. "Then stay at my place. You can shower, change,
take a good nap...whatever you want," she said softly. Her voice was even
softer as she added, "and it would mean you'd be there when I came home."
Brushing her fingers over his lips, he smiled tenderly at her. "I will be
there anyway, ma petite. Thank you." Kissing her one last time, he rose,
lifting her to her feet. "Show me the way? Perhaps we can talk on your
problem
as we go."
Jassa slipped her arm around his waist as they headed for the exit. Though
she'd never felt the need to be protected, she felt safe that way, as if he
would take care of any problem that arose. She handed him the PADD as they
walked.
"Here it is. I, ah, haven't gotten a look at it yet. I got distracted,"
she began, smothering a slight giggle. You sound like a silly teenager when
you do that, Jassa. Cut it out. Biting her lip in an attempt to control
herself, she added, "Those lizard men have these personal shields that repel
phaser fire and the chief has it in his head that the shields may allow them
to
bypass our transporter blocks. If we can find a way to disrupt the shields,
at
the least, I think he'd be happy, the Security chief would be happy...well
it goes on up the line."
"Oui, I see that," he said, kissing the side of her head and smiling to
himself. What a distraction too, he thought. Vincent read the document and
played the video footage several times, each time pulling more information in,
before handing it back to her. "It is intriguing stuff," he said as they
approached her quarters, his mind already ticking over. It felt a little like
an
up hill struggle though, he was firing on an average of three hours sleep for
over a week and the fuzziness of insomniacs everywhere was setting in.
Jassa keyed in the code to open the door and shyly led him inside, at once
grateful that she wasn't a slob. Everything was in its place but the rooms
weren't impersonal. She'd added just enough to make it obvious who lived
there. She placed the PADD on the desk next to her comm screen then took hold
of
both of Vincent's hands. Handsome as he was, he looked tired and worn out.
"Maybe you should take a rest if you aren't due for duty," she said softly,
reaching to brush his cheek with the back of her hand.
"Will you join me?" he breathed as he pulled her close to him. "You said
that you have three hours before your shift. Would you lie down with me?" He
didn't want to push, there was no way he wanted her to do anything beyond
what she felt comfortable with.
Jassa's answer was to reach up with her other hand so that she could put
both arms around his neck. She had to stand on the tips of her toes but she
reached up to kiss him, very softly. He smelled and tasted of coffee, cognac,
and something that was uniquely him. "I think I'd like that," she finally
said, her arms still around him.
Lifting her up, he walked them back towards her bedroom, kissing her softly
and slowly increasing the passion. "So beautiful," he murmured.
She couldn't remember ever being lifted off her feet before and the
sensation was dizzying. The only thing she could focus her attention on was
his kiss
and the feel of his arms around her. Her eyes were fairly glowed up at him
as he set her down on the bed. She never gave a thought to the holopic she
smacked off the night stand earlier. She kissed him again, finding even the
feel of his unshaven cheeks to be perfect. Absolutely perfect.
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