[ussgeorgetown] Confrontinf Families by Alexis Lazarra-Henderson & Elishvrachen ch'Thane
- From: TKilyle@xxxxxxx
- To: ussgeorgetown@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Fri, 15 Jul 2005 17:21:39 EDT
It had been a couple of days since Alex and Vivie had spoken to Lish, yet
she was still feeling at odds. Perhaps she should go talk to him herself. She
changed into her off duty clothing and made her way to the counselor's office.
Taking a deep breath she rang the chime, almost hoping he wouldn't be there.
She was afraid he might figure out what was really bothering her.
As always, Lish got up to answer the door himself. The fact that he had a
lot more of a caseload because Pas was concentrating in Calista was no bother
to him. He wanted all to go well for them. His eyes crinkled when he saw
Alex at the door. "Alex, come in--please. Welcome back."
Alex nervously entered the counselor's office. She sat on the couch trying
not to look directly at Lish. She knew he wasn't telepathic, but that didn't
mean he couldn't sense that something was wrong. "I hope I am not bothering
you, if so I can come back."
"Why would you be bothering me?" Lish asked as he walked to the replicator.
Would you like something to drink? I have been working a bit extra lately
to take some of the load off of Dr. Kaartaren so this is not bother."
"No thanks, I am fine. I don't want to add to your load. Maybe I should just
come back later. I shouldn't have come unannounced."
"No, no, you are quite welcome, Alex," Lish said as he returned with a cup
of Vulcan spice tea. "I am used to the unplanned visits. So, let that be the
least of your worries. Tell me what is on your mind or have you just come
to visit? That would be equally welcome."
"I'm not exactly sure why I am here." Which was true. "I guess there is
still a lot on my mind and I don't know what to do about it." Alex was
nervously
tapping her leg.
"Start at the beginning?" he suggested as he sipped the tea. "Or perhaps
with what is easiest, wherever that may fall."
Alex's mouth was drier than a desert. "Could I bother you for some cold
water? I would really appreciate it. As for what is on my mind none of it is
easy." Believe me, it's not easy at all....
"Of course," Lish said as he got up. The water was cold enough to form
condensation on the sides of the glass. Setting it down on the low table in
front of her, he sat back down. Tapping a slender blue finger against his
lips
he said, "Shall I start for you then, Alex? There is more going through your
thoughts than just this subject of you and your wife having a child. That
much is obvious to me."
Alex almost spit out her drink at Lish's comment. "I thought Andorians
weren't telepathic. What makes you think that there is anything else going on
in
my head other than the baby?" Maybe this was a bad idea after all, I'm not
ready to discuss anything else. "I know that whatever is discussed in here is
confidential, but I don't think I am ready to discuss anything other than
the subject of the baby. I don't even know if I understand what is going on or
why."
"One need not be telepathic to be able to read body language and subliminal
messages, Alex," Lish said gently. "What ever else that is on your mind can
wait until you are ready. But tell me, what of a baby? You do not seem so
eager to have one in your life yet you also want to please your wife."
"It's not that I don't want a baby, it's just I'm not so sure I can handle
it. As it is her younger sister, who is serving on this ship can't stand the
sight of me and thinks that Vivie would be tied to me forever if we had this
baby. According to her I am not right for her sister. She thinks Vivie would
be better off to be rid of me, than to pursue this option. I don't understand.
I don't understand any of it."
Taking a sip of water, Alex felt the coolness flow over her raw throat.
"Lish, I love my wife, very much. I want to make her happy and I thought we
were,
but now with T on board, she is an intrusion. One I don't necessarily like.
Not that I think a baby would be an intrusion. Hell, I don't know what I
think anymore."
"I think there is a saying that one can choose friends but not family. That
is not necessarily so when a person chooses to marry or to bond. I have yet
to meet Viviana's sister but let me ask you this--are you or Viviana
allowing her to interfere or is it just that she is troublesome?"
"No, at least I don't think so. I know that it tears Vivie in half...makes
her feel as if there is not enough of her to go around. I have tried to be
cordial to her sister, I have told her she is welcome in our home, yet she
still
refuses to give me the respect I deserve, even though I have offered it to
her."
"Her sister, though, is hers to deal with. If you are trying to do what you
consider the right thing, then that is all you can do. A relationship, even
one that is so rancorous, takes effort from both parties. You and Viviana
need to discuss the matter without recriminations, without finger pointing,"
Lish said softly. "In the end, there may be a choice to be made by someone.
In my bondmate's case, he is not speaking to his mother...because of me."
"I am sure you have read my file and are aware I have no family or siblings.
Dealing with Vivie's sister is a new experience for me, and not one that I
am doing a good job with. I don't want to come between Vivie and her sister,
and by making her choose is not fair. I am at a loss as to what to do? Family
is everything to Vivie."
"One cannot choose if there is no choice to be made. That decision is not
yours to make. It is hers. You aren't asking her to make a choice. Let me
give you an example. Seren's mother does not like me and he knows that. I do
not prevent him from speaking to her. He is free to do as he wishes but he
chooses not to. His choice. Not mine."
"I know it is her choice, but I also know how much it hurts her when T and I
argue, or T talks bad about me. I'm not sure what to do."
"Do not allow her to bait you into an argument, Alex," Lish said. "If that
is what she is seeking, if she is seeking to provoke you, then do not allow
it. Find a way to deflect, diffuse, or even ignore the words. Many times, in
such situations, it wets the fuel for the fire and leaves the one with the
match at a loss."
Listening to what Lish was saying, she wondered what her Kylara was doing.
"I am trying not to let her bait me, but she is doing so and it is hurting
Vivie. Ignoring words that hurt are not my strong point, Lish. They tend to
anger me more than anything."
"I did not say that you had to ignore what she was saying, Alex," Lish said
calmly. "I simply suggest that you find a way to make them unimportant or
take the anger they provoke and channel it into something that will either
diffuse it or calm you down."
"And what do you suggest I do, besides leaving my own quarter's?"
"Learn to deal with a problem before it happens," Lish told her. "Again, I
will use myself as an example. I have been within sight distance of Seren's
mother but, to me, she does not exist. I deflect what she stirs up in me.
In that case, it was to flatly turn my back on her and ignore her."
"There is no way in hell that Vivie is going to let that happen. Family is
everything to her and now, with wanting a baby, if I were to choose to ignore
Tawny, all it would do is stir up a giant hornet's nest. She will accuse me
of running from the problem instead of facing it or Tawny. She'll come up with
some way to make me feel like what I am feeling doesn't count. She may not
do it intentionally but it will happen."
You can count on it happening........
"Maybe I should just let things be as they are? She doesn't need the added
stress piled on while trying to have a baby. She was raised in a family where
for the most part everyone got along and that's the kind of family she wants
now. Not one where I choose not to interact with her sister, or however I
decide to deal with it."
Lish's antennae twitched toward each other in a shrug. His gray eyes were a
serious calm. "You are, of course, free to do as you will but I think you
would do well to consider that allowing resentment to fester will only result
in it blowing up in your face rather than being able to deal with it while it
is small."
"There again lies part of the problem. Vivie is quite stubborn and no matter
what I do, be in leave them alone when she shows up at our door, or not
speak to her at family gatherings, she is going to explode in my face. She
doesn't understand because she doesn't see it. She sees her sister as just
being
how she always is or was. It also doesn't help with her serving on the same
ship. Lish I don't know what to do. I don't want her to have to choose
between
the two of us, because she shouldn't have to and because I am afraid of what
her choice will be. I know that makes no sense and right now I make no sense."
Alex just stood up, with her arms around her and started to pace.
"Have the three of you actually sat down to talk about this?"
"No, Tawny can't stand to be in the same room as I am." Still pacing Alex
was getting more and more nervous.
"Then it may be a wise idea to ask for a family meeting, for that is what
you are after all, whether you get along or not," Lish told her. "One deals
with different family members in different ways. What works for me with
Seren's brother-in-law is not the same that works for me with our house mates
on
Earth."
"I don't know Lish, how is one supposed to hold a family meeting when one of
the member's can't stand to stay in the same room with one of the others? I
can't see Tawny sitting in the same room with me and her sister trying to
come to some kind of agreement. From the first moment we met, she didn't
approve
or like me and it has gone down hill since."
"Perhaps working your way up to three by starting with two?" Lish asked.
"You and Alex, solely about this matter, then Viviana and her sister...."
Looking at Lish, Alex was growing tired of talking. She was running out of
words to say. "I suppose I could give it a try, although I am pretty sure how
Vivie is going to react. Thanks for putting up with me Lish."
With that Alex headed home to try to talk to Vivie, hoping nothing exploded
in the process.
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