Welcome to The Big Jewel, where radioactive, flesh-eating zombies will always find a warm, savory welcome. The biggest literary news story of the moment involves a teenaged Harvard undergrad who plagiarized her way to 15 minutes of fame (hopefully not more than that). Well, we have our own scribbling teen wannabes, and they can rip off other writers just as cleverly as that brat, so there! Here's a zombie tale told 90210-style, by the man who enjoys thinking like a little girl, Mike Richardson-Bryan: Zombie Outbreak in Small-Town Ontario as Chronicled in the Diary of a Teenaged Girl with a Hopeless Crush By Mike Richardson-Bryan Dear diary, God, nothing EVER happens around here. What does it say about my life when the highlight of my weekend is helping mom clean out the camper? Yeccchhh! Went to another lame Battle of the Bands last night. One of the bands featured three original members of Loverboy, and they were barely halfway through their first song when their drummer went off his nut and attacked the judges (I think he actually bit one of them, too). They still won, though, which tells you something about the music scene in Ontario these days... For the full article please visit http://www.thebigjewel.com/ To unsubscribe from The Big Jewel's Hilarious Weekly Email please send an email with the word UNSUBSCRIBE in the subject line to neilpasricha@xxxxxxxxx