[thebigjewel] FOX Network's Weekly Explanation - March 21, 2007

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  • Date: Wed, 21 Mar 2007 10:12:39 -0600 (MDT)

Welcome to The Big Jewel, where we never watch anything except PBS and
Turner Classic Movies. Ah, who are we kidding? The fact is, like tens of
millions of our fellow citizens we are addicted to American Idol, not
least because we take a fiendish, almost scientific pleasure in observing
the on-air humanoid meltdown-in-progress better known as Paula Abdul:

FOX Network's Weekly Explanation of Paula Abdul's Increasingly Erratic

By Jay Dyckman

We here at FOX are appalled by suggestions that Ms. Abdul was acting
strangely on last night's American Idol. Yes, Paula was emotional during
and after several of the performances. But really, who wouldn't be? Did
you people not hear Sanjaya's rendition of "Ain't No Mountain High
Enough"? What are you, made of stone? I mean, who wouldn't be reduced to
pawing at the face of the person next to you after a poignant moment like

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