To make this perhaps a bit more concrete: I am not very successful at maintaining romantic relationships. I think that one of the reasons for this is that I tend to see what's right as more important than what's most helpful to maintain the relationship. It's difficult for me to admit I'm wrong, especially when I don't think I am. But often that's precisely what's required if one wants to keep the relationship alive; it's sometimes one or the other, not both.
"There's more in life than being right or wrong
There's something in between called getting along"-- Husker Du
I have come to the same conclusion with many of my male friends: that men are committed to "the truth" and women to "social cohesion." I don't particularly value truth-seeking by the way, it's an artificial and abstract pursuit.
Anyhoo, this thinking is my secret shame and I'd be interested to hear what Judy, Veronica and Carol would say.
David Savory
temporarily unlurking 8 stories over the railyards of
Vancouver BC
