Transcribed from William O. Douglas, "Of Men and Mountains." Douglas was a justice of the U.S. Supreme Court. His book is about people he met growing up in the Cascade Range, near Yakima, WA. One of his friends is Billy McGuffie from "Lagginmoore in Wigtownshire" (by which he means "Lagganmore" I presume). One of the things I find interesting about the tale is the dialect Douglas reports McGuffie using. If you can puzzle it out, you'll find quite the tale.
"It was a dae i' the autumn o' 1915 when the win' blew cauld wi' angry sooch. Motor caurs were gey few an' clatterin', an' horses were as frichtit o' them as the Indians lange syne were feart o' the West'ard march o' the white man. Roads were fit alone for four- fitted beasties that dinna' min muckle holes and sand.
"It was in su' a dae that my auld frien' Sandy McGee, ma wife, an' masel' startit oot i' ma new Buick caur up intil the Kilckitat country which lies couthie again' the sprawlin' sides of Mount Adams. We were hurlin' up tae the sheilin's on the moors whar ma sheep feed at the back end o' the year.
"As we traipsit alang about seventy miles frae home and the nearest repair shop in Yakima, what did we dae but strike a muckle big stane whit brak the oil pump off ma brent-new Buick, an' a' the oil i' the ceelingers cam' skalin' oot. Bein' o' pioneer stock I had tae ca' upon the gear to han', so I gaed aff on fit tae ma reist sheep sheilin' aboot twa miles awa' whaur I found some car'board an' oot o' it I cut a piece that fittit in whaur the missin' oil pump was supposed tae be. Lookin' aroon' I found an auld rubber boot that had been thrown awa', frae which I made a gasket to seal the bottom. Then, wi' twin pu'd oot o' flour sacks, I made the job strang. Then I prayed tae the Almighty it was ticht an' firm eneuch tae haud.
"After a' this, fried the tallow oot i' a huggie ower a campfire, and timmed it oot into a wheen auld cans, aye found in thae times wherever the herds had been bidin' a while. As tomato, pea, sauerkraut, and coffee cans were filled wi' hot tallow, I kept the fat meltit' by puttin' them neist the fire. But the tallow frae the can I first filled, which I believe was labeled 'Alaska Red Salmon,' was timmed ower the tap o' ma reinforced car'board floor and allowed tae cool and harden, an forbye tae fill the cracks and crannies ma hasty work had left.
"When a' the cans were filled wi' hot tallow, I timmed it quickly into the crancase and we startit back doon the twistin' mountain roads and got hame with nae mair fash at a'.
"Of course, the Buick Company made a muckle ado aboot the event. The story was tell't in newspapers and magazines a' ower the land. I was even offert tae travel wi' a' expenses paid tae for aw' toons, but nane o' that for me. I had tae bide here and herd ma sheep."
David Ritchie, Portland, Oregon ------------------------------------------------------------------ To change your Lit-Ideas settings (subscribe/unsub, vacation on/off, digest on/off), visit www.andreas.com/faq-lit-ideas.html
