[lit-ideas] Re: Paper, Plastic, the Vacuum

  • From: David Ritchie <profdritchie@xxxxxxxxx>
  • To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Date: Thu, 16 Feb 2012 18:09:34 -0800

Dishwasher repair guy arrived today and promptly declared our beast to be 
beyond all hope.  Having investigated the innards and knowing this was likely, 
why did I keep the appointment?  Yesterday I went to a showroom and quickly 
learned that dishwashers have not improved over the last decade and may have 
become worse.  Thus I hoped we could make our good old one make do with, say, a 
new pump.  I got my money's worth from the man by quizzing him up and down 
about which ones he repairs least, which one he owns and so on.  Then I asked 
for a lesson in cleaning the refrigerator's coil, which I had been unable to 
locate.  This is because in the new and improved refrigerators they moved what 
used to be at the back of the machine to a handy dandy spot...underneath.  To 
clean the coil, you simply lie on the floor, pop off the plastic cover and suck 
all the dust into your beard and up your nose.  There's an improvement!  But of 
course if you don't do this...the compressor overheats and the fridge dies.  We 
had quite the collection of dog and cat hair in ours.

Off we went this afternoon to see what appliance stores could offer.  The 
trusty one we used to frequent has been taken over by new owners.  Outside were 
a Mercedes and an Audi.  Inside was a grumpy fellow who seemed not the least 
bit interested in selling anything.  Would barely speak to us.  All I can think 
is that it's a Mafia front of some kind.  Further up the street there was once 
a boat dealer that operated on the same principle.  It turned out that it was a 
money-laundering operation.  Maybe I should ask the appliance dealer whether he 
could wash some of my notes in one of his machines?

The next place had dishwashers with plastic roundy roundy bits, dishwashers 
with doors that squeak as you open them, dishwashers with racks that roll out 
smoothly...some of the time.  Choices, choices.  We thought we had a contender 
until one of us asked how/why some of the machines are ADA compliant.  It turns 
out that some dishwashers are now taller than others.  The way they sell the 
short old ones is by explaining that folk in wheelchairs will be able to load 
them.  We had to go home to measure whether our space is the right size for 
either option.  We believe it is.

Now we refer to our handy notes on which ones didn't squeak.  It may have been 
D5424ADA B or maybe 230358764.  Or possibly 0216270PLII.  To avoid potential 
trouble with the Geneva Convention, we didn't record name and rank.

Carry on,

David Ritchie,
Portland, 
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