Thank you Dan
Só precious !
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________________________________
Van: constellationtalk-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
<constellationtalk-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> namens Dan Cohen
<danboothcohen@xxxxxxxxx>
Verzonden: Tuesday, March 9, 2021 3:49:46 PM
Aan: constellationtalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxx <constellationtalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Onderwerp: [constellationtalk] Re: Honor Killings ?
Hi Anngwyn and all –
Here’s an excerpt from a chapter I contributed to an academic text book on
Forgiveness and Reconciliation.
An Indigenous Approach to Forgiveness
We can find formulas for trans-generational forgiveness in the ritualized
practices of many indigenous cultures. For example, the village of Shefar’Am in
Israel lies on the ancient trade routes linking Beirut, Damascus, and
Jerusalem. The villagers practice the traditional Palestinian peacemaking
process known as Sulha which has its roots in early Semitic writings, Christian
scriptures, and Islamic Arab literature. “Sulha is first and foremost based on
forgiveness” (Jabbour, 1993, p. 31). This form of forgiveness is a
community-based process that involves not only the offender and victim, but
their immediate and extended families, a council of trusted elders, and members
of the community-at-large. It integrates words and deeds.Sulha begins when a
traumatic event, such as murder, occurs in the community.
It is understood that, absent a reconciliation process, the killing can
initiate a blood feud between the families of the victim and murderer that can
spill into the next generation. The Sulha is led by a group of respected elders
each of whom is viewed as wise, fair, honest, and trustworthy. The elders
control the process, which sometimes takes months to achieve a full resolution.
Forgiveness within the context of the Sulha requires that the offender publicly
acknowledges their guilt, expresses remorse, and offers meaningful (even if
sometimes symbolic) restitution. The grandparents, parents, and children in the
affected families come together for an elaborate public ceremony. In front of
the community, the victim’s family accepts the offer of reconciliation and
swears not to seek revenge. The ceremony ends with speeches, prayers,
handshakes, and a shared meal.
Trauma and Forgiveness
When traumatic crimes and injustices committed in one generation are not
resolved, successive generations are drawn into the fray. Within the United
States, the impact of mass traumas such as African slavery and the genocide of
the Native Peoples still reverberate in collective consciousness. Immigrant
groups, who escaped from extreme circumstances such as the Nazi Holocaust,
Armenian genocide, or Vietnam War, pass the legacy of these events to their
descendants. Without fully comprehending their impulses, children and
grandchildren often feel compelled to complete what they did not start, atone
for what they did not do, or inflict punishment on the living for crimes
committed by those who are now dead.
Trans-generational forgiveness cannot be achieved with a simple apology and its
acceptance. When the acts that caused harm are irreversible, the pathway to
forgiveness places special demands on both sides. For the perpetrators, or
their descendants, forgiveness requires acknowledging guilt, expressing sincere
remorse, and offering a reasonable restitution. For the victims and their
descendants, forgiveness is an act of deep compassion and humility that
restores the sweetness of life to the living.
Forgiveness leaves the guilt with the perpetrator and frees the victims from
the desire for vengeance. It comes when perpetrators, victims, and their
descendants include each other as full members of the human community. The fate
of all individuals involved are accepted and respected, even those who
committed acts described by Arendt (1958) as “radical evil.” Such forgiveness
is never complete in life.
Dan
From: <constellationtalk-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> on behalf of "Anngwyn (Redacted
sender "anngwyn" for DMARC)" <dmarc-noreply@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Reply-To: <constellationtalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Date: Monday, March 8, 2021 at 3:01 PM
To: "constellationtalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxx" <constellationtalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Subject: [constellationtalk] Honor Killings ?
Greetings from Arizona,
Does anyone have experience with the impact of Honor Killings in Islamic and
other family systems?
Warm Regards,
Anngwyn St. Just Ph.D.
Director: Arizona Center for Social Trauma.
Sedona,AZ. USA
