Thanks for this Barbara. You’re reminding me that Vlado Ilic says in his
workshops that he also never does de-roling. He says that when you rep, you are
also having your own constellation, and that you want that continue inside of
you. I’m not sure I go that far, but it did open my eyes to the connectedness
you’re talking about. I always appreciate a strongly stated opposite viewpoint
that makes me re-think some of the “basics” we think we all share. ;-)
The Rev. Leslie Nipps
Convivium Constellations - Founder, Practitioner & Trainer
“Trust as a Way of Life…”
www.conviviumconstellations.com
"Hasten to that which supports." - The I Ching
On Mar 31, 2017, at 8:26 PM, Barbara Morgan theknowingfield@xxxxxxxxx
[ConstellationTalk] <ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Hi Jack and all,
Whilst I respect the different approaches we all have towards facilitation and
the richness of the constellations field that is produced as a result, I find
it difficult to align myself with the idea of ritualising the process of
de-roling and creating a 'rule' around it, at the same time as subscribing to
the idea of systemic consciousness and field phenomena.
When I facilitate or train, I say to people that for me every single
representation is a gift; I am inextricably linked to the representation in
some way and particularly if I sit down after the constellation and am left
with something, then the gift is there for me to do with whatever feels
appropriate at the time. If I am able to stay open to what's there and receive
the energy with respect and openness then I will be enriched in some way. At
the same time, if someone doesn't want to stay with something in that moment
and specifically asks to be 'de-roled' after the constellation, I don't argue
with that. I respect their wishes and we do a ritual similar to that described
by Leslie Nipps.
But I do my best to convey to all participants that we have all entered into
this particular field at this particular time from a place of inter-connection
and that whether we are in the client seat, representing or in the holding
circle, we will all be affected by what happens in a constellation. If we
create a separation by doing these kinds of rituals – as a 'rule' or under the
leadership of the facilitator, then we fly in the face of some of the essential
aspects of what, for me, constellations are. We step into a field and in that
moment we become one with the field and by virtue of being chosen for this
representation something of us is resonating with it. As soon as we start to
question, is this me or the representation we have moved away from presence to
some extent. I tell people not to worry about that but to trust what happens
and go with the flow. Then they become more present to the experience.
For me one of the most sacred aspects of constellation work is to witness the
murmurations of starlings where each and every bird flies together with the
flock 'as one' creating the most amazing shapes in the sky. In England I am
fortunate to live fairly close to a couple of places where these murmurations
happen in a most spectacular way each year and I take my trainees there to
witness this amazing phenomenon. This 'oneness' is visible throughout the
natural world. Why would we think that as human beings we are any different?
We are all capable of being an axe murderer as much as we are capable of being
the most loving parent or innocent child and no matter what the representation,
there will be a gift, a message in it somewhere for us if and when we are ready
to hear it. So the process then becomes a circular one – we are in service to
the client and their field at the same time as receiving the gift that that
particular representation offers us.
In the Western world, the concept of individualism is so deeply ingrained that
I think it is extremely difficult for people to subscribe fully to 'group
consciousness' and our concepts of 'right and wrong', 'good' and 'bad' make it
difficult for us to fully inhabit our inner perpetrator.
I feel supported by Anngwyn St. Just's writing in this respect, as she has done
so much research into these systemic phenomena over generations and the
repetitions that can occur in such an uncanny way.
Warm wishes to all
Barbara
On 31 March 2017 at 02:37, Laure Porché laure.porche@xxxxxxxxx
[ConstellationTalk] <ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Hi Jack and all,
All great tools that I also use. I will only add that in my beginning speech I
emphasize the importance of de-roling, using Fran's metaphor of not leaving
with the silverware when you're invited as a guest somewhere. I also make it
clear to the representative that they don't have to carry what they represent
fully, and that they can put it in a virtual backpack if it becomes too intense.
Also, the importance of each representative giving back what's theirs to the
client at the end.
Thanks for raising the subject, as I've been to several workshop where this
wasn't taken care of at all, to usually distressing results.
Blessings on all,
Laure
On Mar 30, 2017 4:28 PM, "Heiki Eesmaa heiki.eesmaa@xxxxxxxxx
[ConstellationTalk]" <ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Hi Jack,
I've been thinking about this question a lot as well.
As you wrote in your blog article, prior set-up is important. The downside of a
safe atmosphere seems to be that people go deeper into dynamics & trauma as
well.
Something to consider that I don't see used that often: mark the start of
representation with a clear ritual as well (as well as concluding ritual for
representations). There are differences between using various ritual phrases
e.g "You now are ..." vs "You now represent ..." The latter leaves the
representative freer and clearer in the role whereas the former is more
mediumistic, which sometimes correlates to the reps being shaken and out of
sorts.
all the best
Heiki
On Fri, Mar 31, 2017 at 1:51 AM, Jeffrey Rich jeffrey.rich@xxxxxxxxx
[ConstellationTalk] <ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Thank you, Leslie! I love that.
In my training with Francesca, she reminded us that representing is a gift; we
are invited into "the person's living room" for a time, and to remain there
afterward is a sort of trespass. It's like stealing a life from someone else.
I am a shamanic practitioner who does a lot of similar work, and I use various
methods of grounding (physically going outside and standing on the Earth),
switching seats, etc.
For me I remind myself of the ways in which I am personally different from the
person I represented: "I am short; they are tall / I am gay; they are straight"
etc., which helps with the differentiation for me. I also read this method
somewhere and I cannot for the life of me remember where. If anyone knows where
this came from, please help me remember!
Physical activity, eating a small amount of food (Grapes, nuts, a little
protein, etc.) can help with this.
Sometimes the representation has been "sticky" for me and has lingered despite
my best efforts to let it go.
Hope this is helpful.
Best,
Jeffrey
Jeffrey Rich BS, LMT
www.shining-mountain.com ~ www.waterwillowmoon.com | (256)337-1699
Massage Therapist, Constellations Facilitator, Shamanic Practitioner, Teacher
"What is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" ~Mary Oliver
On Thu, Mar 30, 2017 at 4:37 PM, Leslie Nipps lnipps@xxxxxxxxx
[ConstellationTalk] <ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
I can’t remember where I picked this up, so if the originator (or a person who
knows the originator) of this ritual is here, let us know! I didn’t create it
(although I’ve adapted it a little).
Immediately following the constellation, we all sit back in the seats we had
before we started. We go in a circle saying “My name is ________, and I
represented _______.” Each time the client looks at the person and simply says
“thank you.” If a person didn’t represent, they say “My name is __________, and
I was a witness.”
People LOVE this little ritual. On the rare occasions I forget, I always get
complaints. ;-)
The Rev. Leslie Nipps
Convivium Constellations - Founder, Practitioner & Trainer
“Trust as a Way of Life…”
www.conviviumconstellations.com
"Hasten to that which supports." - The I Ching
On Mar 30, 2017, at 10:15 AM, jack blackwell travelerjbjb@xxxxxxxxx
[ConstellationTalk] <ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
helping representatives release the energies they are holding for the client.
I am curious about releasing immediately after a constellation
And also something thoughts on releasing after the entire workshop.
Your thoughts and wisdom are greatly appreciated.
Thank you, Jack Blackwell
Jack Blackwell (720) 458-5363
Connecting Spirit & Psychology ~ Creates Profound Insights & Healing
Family Constellation Workshops & Trainings, Group & Private Therapy Offerings
Learn more here: healingfamilytrauma.com
--
Barbara Morgan
Family Constellations Trainer, Supervisor & Practitioner
Editor of
The Knowing Field
International Constellations Journal
www.cominghome.org.uk
www.theknowingfield.com
