Actually, CMR, I don't see these tips as being inappropriate in a CL
case, though one might add a few that read more positively or
collaboratively.
#1 is spot on -- I've had clients, a very few, who've been disturbed
by the size of their bills after routinely calling me about all kinds
of things they wanted to discuss at length, the legal components of
which were tiny.
#2 would always be a good idea, except (1) in a CL case, as to the
other spouse, and (2) as to one's "kitchen cabinet."
#3 -- see #1.
#4 is always good advice, especially in a CL case.
#5 is good advice, though it reads kind of "over-authoritarian" as
written. But if I need a client to do something, it's not for MY good
but rather for his/hers, and it needs to get done, timely.
#6 -- see #4.
Am I misreading or missing something?
-- -- --
Douglas J. Sanderson
McCandlish & Lillard, P.C.
11350 Random Hills Road, Suite 500
Fairfax, Virginia 22030-7429
Telephone: (703) 934-1122
Facsimile: (703) 352-4300
email: dsand@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
www.mccandlaw.com
On Jan 5, 2011, at 10:32 AM, carl Michael rossi wrote:
That's what I make of this set of 'tips' for clients about their relationship with their divorce lawyer that I came upon on the web. I'm not using any links because I'm not interested in bashing litigation, ever. And certainly don't wish to disparage this attorney. The site does not suggest that they do anything other than litigation, and In a litigated case, I might well agree with these tips. [that is, back when I did litigation at all]
Yet I found the tips a sad reminder. I could spend the rest of the day doing interlinear comments, but maybe they're too obvious....
AND I wonder what a set of six tips for working with your COLLABORATIVE lawyer might be??? Thoughts?
If you've never been through a divorce before, or never had reason to seek legal counsel in some other matter, then you probably are in the dark on what to expect with your new, intense relationship with your family law attorney. Here are a few pointers to help guide you.
Tip #1 - Your attorney is not your best "go to" friend. First and foremost, the attorney-client relationship is born of necessity and there is definitely difficult work to be done. You will be sharing information with your divorce attorney that you probably never expected to share with anyone, ever. You will be discussing matters of a highly personal nature. Don't confuse your attorney's genuine interest as your legal advocate with being your best friend.
Tip #2 - Resist the temptation to talk. Resist the temptation to disclose confidences to your friends about your case. It may feel like a release at the time, but you may seriously undermine your case in doing so. Your communications with your attorney are privileged and confidential. You should not share those privileged communications with anyone else, and certainly not with the opposing party.
Tip #3 - Your attorney is not your therapist. The end of a marriage is often grieved over, as a real painful loss. If you feel the need to talk to someone, to unload and release some pent-up emotion, consult with your therapist. Family law cases can be intense, and you may need to decompress and talk with someone about your feelings and troubles. When you choose to unload during your sessions with your attorney, the attorney fees will go up, a lot. When you meet with your attorney, try to stay focused and reasoned. Attorney's typically bill by the hour, if you want to talk about something irrelevant with your $350/hour attorney, then accept the consequences of a very substantial bill at the end of the month.
Tip #4 - Make sure you understand your attorney's legal strategy. Your attorney should have a fairly solid plan for your case. Legal strategies may shift as your case develops, but your attorney should keep you apprised of what is going on, and when, and why. There are a lot of procedural aspects and details that your attorney will handle directly. However, you should understand the strengths and weaknesses of your case. And your attorney should provide you with a roadmap to navigate through what can be a very lengthy, stressful, and confusing process.
Tip #5 - Do as your attorney tells you. If your attorney tells you to complete a 15-page form with over 100 questions about your finances, and to submit it to the law office within 30 days, then get the job done, preferably early so your attorney can get to work on it. Don't procrastinate and don't work half-heartedly. Be thorough, do as you are told, and turn it over to your attorney. Don't make the law office ask repeatedly for the same information before you take the matter seriously. Every time your attorney has to follow up and contact you about delivering what you were already told to deliver, you spend more in legal fees.
Tip #6 - Don't let your attorney leave you behind. Family law cases seem to take forever to get through, and if there are minor children involved, child custody and parenting time issues will likely go on long after the divorce is final. If you feel your case is languishing, and progress is slow or even nonexistent, speak with your attorney regarding your concerns. You may need to adjust your expectations regarding the speed at which your case can be resolved. However, if there are only more delays and no action, then consider whether your attorney has become less enthusiastic about your case for a reason. And if so, why? If the relationship has soured between you and your attorney to the point where your case may be affected, then it may be time to seek new counsel.
If you are considering filing for divorce in ___, or have legal issues concerning property division, child custody, or alimony, our family law attorneys have the experience you can rely on. From prenuptial agreements through judgment modifications, you can put your trust in the Law Offices of _____.
InJoy!
cMr
Collaborative Practice Chicago
Divorce Without Warfare
carl Michael rossi, M.A. J.D., L.P.C.
Attorney, Mediator, Coach, Counselor
773-292-3456
cMr@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
www.CPChicago.net
Executive Director, Collaborative Practice Professionals of Illinois
