Wooo-Hoooo Karen. That is awesome!!!!
Congratulations, Linda Lee
On Sat, Feb 27, 2021 at 6:03 PM Karen Saxton <kcsaxton@xxxxxxxxx> wrote:
"if we all participate when someone insults another"
Yes. One of the best things we can do is comment publically to the comment
and ignore the person making the bullying comments, while bolstering the
newcomer eg "I can see why you thought this might be a XX. The key to
telling it apart from YY is thus..." It is what I teach my kids to do, but
in a slightly different form when they see bullying at school: they are to
invite the bullied kid to sit or play with them, which simply takes the
wind out from under the bully's wings(to use a birdy metaphor). One of my 8
year old students did this with a kid who was older and being bullied by
his peers. According to adults who watched it happen, the bullies just
stood there with their mouths agape, when this little blonde girl said, you
don't have to listen to them, come wait for your mom with me! She won Miss
Congeniality at the Miss Oregon pageant a couple years back and is a force
to be reckoned with (and studying natural resource management).
On Sat, Feb 27, 2021 at 7:47 AM Teresa Hertzel <teresa.hertzel@xxxxxxxxx>
wrote:
Yes, if we all participate when someone insults another, then at least
one of us can get to the newbie very quickly and stand up for them.
On Sat, Feb 27, 2021 at 9:46 AM <jmeredit@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Nice work Teresa. What a great way to resolve things and I like your
idea that it is on all of us to speak up if we see a problem. Judy in Bend
Jmeredit@xxxxxxxxxxx
On 2021-02-27 11:58, Teresa Hertzel wrote:
I have sent a message to the OBA Board, suggesting that they start an
email listserv (or a Whatsapp or whatever format suits them best) for their
own OBA members. They can use it to communicate to their members about
upcoming events, field trips, policies, and anything else they wish to
share with their members. A Board meeting is scheduled for next week and I
hope they will consider this.
Meanwhile, Jeff Gilligan and Linda Fink have been friends for a long
time and have discovered that there was a misinterpretation and
misunderstanding between them, based on Linda's not knowing that Jeff was
the person who was being accused of bullying because she had not been
reading OBOL for awhile. I hope both of them will post here and explain it.
Jeff's knee-jerk reaction to the perceived betrayal by a friend was
inappropriate and I'm sure he will acknowledge that.
Here is an idea I had last night for helping control any future problems
on OBOL (which of course will never happen, right?):
If YOU perceive someone being unwelcoming or condescending to a newbie,
or if you perceive someone bullying someone else, or behaving in a
degrading way to another member, immediately forward that message to me
with your thoughts, even just one sentence about what you see. This should
only take you a few seconds, so it's not labor intensive for you. If at
least 10 (? not sure of the threshhold) people forward such a message to
me, I will immediately put that poster on Moderated Post and send him or
her a private message, and also write to the bullied one. That way, we have
a more democratic process, with everyone getting heard instead of just
unsubscribing in disgust. That way, all members also have more control and
don't have to feel helpless. I believe over time we can make newbies feel
more welcome and control the bullying and misogyny. This is just an idea,
but thought I'd put it out there for comment.
