[thereisone] Thinking About Nothing
- From: Gutman Locks <locks.gutman@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: thereisone@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Sun, 19 Dec 2021 07:19:16 +0200
[image: Thinking.png]
Thinking About Nothing
*Daniel*, a *baal teshuva*, wrote a *long* letter explaining why he
felt he should go back to the zen (Buddhism) meditation that he learned and
practiced before he did *teshuva*. He wrote such things as:
“I feel like I have unfinished business in terms of silent sitting
meditation, the zen style of meditation, just noticing thoughts and staying
with the body and the breath, returning to the body and the breath over and
over again. Before I became religious, I was very motivated to sit in
silent meditation, I had attended some intensive zen retreats. Back then I
had intentionally chosen a zen center that did not have statues, and the
zen teacher there was Jewish, so this all made me feel better about going
there.
“At the end of that first five-day silent meditation retreat, I walked
out and looked up at a tree, and it seemed like, for the first time, I was
seeing every single leaf of the tree. It seemed like life was much more
clear, like I had burned through a fog that I had been living in.
“… as I became more religious, I felt that, as much as I hungered to
continue that zen type of meditation, that I should avoid it because it was
not of Jewish origin and could be somehow damaging
“Who knows, maybe some Jewish sages of old even used this exact
technique of "observing the mental process and experiencing present bodily
sensations".
“Is there anything wrong with this? I have avoided doing this silent
sitting meditation but I really hunger to go back. I feel like I have
unfinished business with it. I feel like this kind of wordless silent
meditation is a totally different thing from the textual and wordful nature
of Torah study, and I really hunger for this silent still wordless
experiential meditation and yearn to deepen into it.
“Yet I hope I'm not doing anything dangerous by pursuing this silent
meditation. This silent meditation seems to be more of a
mechanical/technical practice so to speak (and therefore safe), even though
it doesn't have any obvious or required connection to G-d.
“What do you think? Can I jump back in without fear? I still put on
tefillin and keep kosher and keep Shabbat.”
Gutman’s Response:
You think you need that wasted meditation because your Torah
observance is entirely empty of spiritual awareness. If you would do the
following Jewish awareness practice instead, you would gain what you feel
you are missing.
First, remind yourself: Where is Hashem?
If you, as you should, know the answer is that Hashem is everywhere,
then you will know that He is right there on your lips, too. Once you
remember this, then as you go through your day, not as a retreat, not as a
practice, but
as your way of life.... sweetly and lovingly speak to Hashem. Say such
things as, “Abba, I love You.”
He is not only the Creator, the Infinite, He is your Father who is
waiting for you to remember him.
When you remember Hashem, you fulfill your purpose of being in His
world and you will not want to think about “nothing” anymore.
To reply; email me directly at: locks.gutman@xxxxxxxxx
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