[mit-ac6] Stupid Human Tricks
- From: "Amado Ian De Jesus" <ian_ekin@xxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: mit-ac6@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Fri, 06 Sep 2002 11:13:20 +0000
>Subject: FW: Stupid Human Tricks
>
>***When his .38-caliber revolver failed to fire at its intended victim
>during a holdup in Long Beach, California, robber James Elliot did
>something that can only inspire wonder: he peered down the barrel and tried
>the trigger again. Happily for most citizens, this time it worked.
>
>***Laborer Alexander Robinson of Mobile, Alabama, redefined tact when he
>opened his eyes after surgery to restore his sight and said agreeably to
>his wife: "Boy, you sure got fat in four years".
>
>***The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting
>machine and after a little hopping around, submitted a claim to his
>insurance company. The insurance company suspecting negligence, sent out
>one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and also
>lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.
>
>***An American tourist in South America had the misfortune to be attacked
>by bees as he stood on the bank of the Amazon River. Seeking refuge, he
>leapt into the river and was promptly attacked by piranha fish.
>
>***A Malaysian monkey that had been trained to gather coconuts from trees
>demonstrated a pressing need for a refresher course when it leapt onto the
>shoulders of a passer-by in Kuala Lumpur and tried to twist his head off.
>
>***A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car
>during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle only to find that a
>woman had taken his parking space. He shot her dead.
>
>***After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver
>found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from
>Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence,
>the driver went to a nearby bus-stop and offered everyone in the queue a
>free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital
>telling staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre
>fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days
>
>***In Minneapolis, USA, 28 year old Derrick L. Richardson has been
>charged with third-degree murder of his much loved cousin, Ken E.
>Richardson. According to local police, Derrick had suggested to Ken that
>they play a game of Russian Roulette, but having no revolver, instead
>provided a semi-automatic pistol to his cousin. He said he did not realize
>that one bullet always loads into the firing chamber of a semi-automatic.
>
>***A teenager went to hospital with serious head wounds received from an
>oncoming train. When asked about how he received the injuries, the lad
>told the police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get
>his head to a moving train before he was hit.
>
>***A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to give her an
>examination to determine the cause of her daughter's swollen abdomen. It
>only took the doctor about two seconds to say "Your daughter is pregnant."
>The mother turned red with fury and argued with the doctor that her
>daughter was a good girl and would never compromise her reputation by
>having sex with a boy. Throughout the mother's tirade, the doctor turned
>to face the window and silently watched the horizon. The mother soon
>became even more enraged as she screamed, "Quit looking out the window!
>Aren't you paying attention to me?" "Yes, of course I am paying
>attention ma'am. It's just that the last time this happened, a star
>appeared in the east, and three wise men came. I was hoping they would
>show up again and help me figure out who got your daughter pregnant.
>
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