"I'll not give them the satisfaction," I thought
In a quavering voice - so many had fallen --
I could hear the shots from where they did -
Feeling no fear of their consequence yet
Needing to be the good Marine - an example
To the long row ahead, seeing their necks
Craning to look back at me to see if I
Still stood, thinking if I did at my age
They too being younger might as well -
Those who fell, we knew, hadn't the
Strength or resolve - fluttering
Hands, thoughts, vacant looks when
They thought no one was looking -
Someone like me though, used to
Long treks would put one foot in
Front of the rest - losing track perhaps
Of the steps: where they leave off and
Another's began - where I began if
Memory hasn't fatally fallen behind.
One of them opted out after breaking
Both hands in fights saying if one
Unflinchingly endures the pain, these
Miles upon menacing miles are mere
Grunt work - whereas the enduring of
Pain is the ultimate demonstration.
They watched our steps for the ones
Who stumbled, pulled them out and
Shot them in the head - where is the
Sacrifice in that? Where the bravery
In a false step? The implications, the
Conclusions contingent upon whatever
Flew off with our steps, step after
Step - there were once paved roads, but
We were now on a rugged Jeep trail --
Even at night, marching route-step,
Staggering at thoughts of dropping
Out, perhaps rolling down a slope
When attention flagged, but best
That I keep on. The stars might
Find me out. I heard a shot far
Back where the strength to keep
On for those watching came from.
