[guide.chat] In Reply To: The Battle of Trafalgar

From: "Elizabeth Kay" <ebeth.kay@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
To: "John Keel" <j.keel1428@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx>, "chat forum" <guide.chat@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Date: Mon, 19 Nov 2012 15:05:10 -0000
Thanks John. Once again you have reminded me of happy days when my brother Bob 
used to recite Stanley Holloways monologues. I could only remember odd words 
and phrases of Trafalgar but hearing the recitation again  brings them all back 
to me.I have saved  it along with the others.  
Interesting too to hear your war experience. I married and brought up two 
children during the second world war  and I remember air raids over Manchester 
and Liverpool. Mothers of young children wer not expeced to do war work but I 
did my share of digging for Victory etc and looked after two evacuees when the 
doodle- bugs were falling on London.  Best Wishes Elizabeth

-----Original Message-----
From: John Keel - Email Address: j.keel1428@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sent On: 18/11/2012 16:16
Sent To: chat forum - Email Address: guide.chat@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: [guide.chat] The Battle of Trafalgar

I'll tell you a seafaring story,
Of a lad who won honour and fame,
With Nelson at battle Trafalgar,
Joe Muggeridge, that were is name.
He were one of the crew of the Victory,
His job when a battle begun,
Was to take canon balls out of basket,
and shuve 'em down front end of gun.
One day 'im and nelson were boxing,
The compass like sailor lads do,
When 'ardy comes up wi' a spy glass,
and pointing says, "ear, take a screw."
They looked to where 'ardy were pointing,
and saw lots of ships in a row.
Joe says, abrupt like but respectful,
"Horacio lad, yons the foe."
Nelson said, "what say we attack 'em?"
Joe said, "Nay, not today."
'ardy says, "ay, let's toss up,"
Horacio answers, "ok."
They tossed, it were 'eads for attacking,
And tails for the tother way bout,
And Joe lend his two headed penny,
So the answer were never in doubt.
When penny came down 'ead side uperds,
They were in for a do that were plain,
And Joe murmured, "Shiver me timbers,"
And Nelson kissed 'ardy again. 
And then taking flags out of locker,
He strung out a message on high,
It were all about England and duty,
Crew thought they was 'ung out to dry.
They got the guns ready for action,
And that gave 'em trouble enough, 
They 'adn't been fired all the summer,
And touch 'oles were bunged up wi' fluff.
Joe's canon it weren't 'alf a corker,
The canon balls went three foot 'round,
They weren't no toy balloons neither, 
They weighed close on 65 pounds.
Joe, selecting two of the largest,
Was going to load double for luck,
When a hot shot came in through the port'ole,
And a gun powder barrel got struck.
By gum, there weren't 'alf an explosion,
The gun crew was filled with alarm,
As out of the port'ole went Joseph,
Wi' a canon ball under each arm. 
At that moment, up came the boat swine,
'e says, "Were's Joe,"  gunner replied,
"'e's taken two cannon balls with 'im,
And gone for a breather outside."
"Do you think 'e'll be long?"  says the boat swine,
The gunner replied, "If as 'ow,
'e comes back as quick as 'e left us,
'e should be 'ear any time now."
And all this tie Joe treading water,
Was trying 'is 'ardest to float,
'e shouted through termoyle of battle,
"Tell someone to lower a boat".
'e'd come to the top for assistance,
Then down to the bottom 'e'd go,
This up and down kind of existence,
Made everyone laugh, except Joe.
At last 'e could stand it no longer,
And next time 'e came to the top,
'e said, "If you don't come and save me,
I'll let these ear canon balls drop."
T'were Nelson at finish who saved 'im,
and 'e said Joe deserved the VC, 
But finding 'e 'adn't one 'andy,
'e gave Joe an egg for is tea.
And after the battle was over,
And vessel were safely in dock,
The sailors all saved up their coupons,
And bought Joe a nice marble clock.
[guide.chat] In Reply To: The Battle of Trafalgar

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