[first_defenders] Fw: Rules Guys Wished Girls Knew
- From: "Jason Brett-Williams" <StormHawk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: <first_defenders@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Tue, 28 Jan 2003 16:27:07 -0330
----- Original Message -----
From: Philip Tam (WBTQ)
To: 'nancyobrien76@xxxxxxxxxxx' ; 'cyn323@xxxxxxxxxxx' ;
'stormhawk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx' ; 'davidyu_3283@xxxxxxxxxxx' ; 'z42rbc@xxxxxxxxx'
; 'rkinden@xxxxxxxxxx' ; 'dboy53@xxxxxxxxxxx' ; 'jason_darwin_white@xxxxxxxxx'
Sent: Tuesday, January 28, 2003 12:15 PM
Subject: Rules Guys Wished Girls Knew
Subject: Rules Guys Wished Girls Knew
Rules Guys Wished Girls Knew.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Quit asking us.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it's up, put it down.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not sacred quests to see if he
can find the perfect present, again!
5. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you
don't want to hear.
6. Sometimes, he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
7. Don't ask him what he's thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss
such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation and monster trucks.
8. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different; it's just like every other
cat.
9. Dogs are better than ANY cats. Period.
10. Sunday equals sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it go!
11. Shopping is not sport.
12. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
13. You have enough clothes.
14. You have too many shoes.
15. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.
16. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.
17. No, he doesn't know what day it is. He never will - just mark anniversaries
on a calendar.
18. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than peeing from pointblank
range. We're bound to miss sometimes.
9. Most guys own two to three pairs of shoes. What makes you think we'd be any
good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look
good with your dress?
20. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
21. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
22. Your Mom doesn't have to be our best friend.
23. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
24. Check your oil.
25. Don't give us 50 rules when 25 will do.
26. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.
27. It is neither in your best interest nor ours to take the quiz together.
28. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All
comments become null and void after 7 days.
29. If you don't dress like the Victoria Secret girls, don't expect us to act
like soap opera guys.
30. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes
you sad and angry, we meant the other one.
31. Let us ogle in peace. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how
pretty you are?
32. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
33.You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done-not
both.
34. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
35. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
36. Women wearing Wonder bras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain
about having their boobs stared at.
37. Consider golf a mini-vacation from you. We need it, just like you do.
38. Telling us that the models in the men's magazines are airbrushed makes you
look jealous and petty and it's certainly not going to
deter us from reading the magazines.
39. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we
were going out - get over it
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