Exactly so, Miriam. But even so, my life is more or less an open
book. The things that I hide from my family, I hide from the lists
I'm on, but the things I share, and what I believe, does not vary
whether in Real Time or in Email Time. I sent you a sample Christmas
letter(no obligation to have to read it) from 2016, and of course
you're right. I do try to set a tone, but the truth is that it is a
quick glimpse into the real life and feelings of Carl and Cathy.
Overall, our life is pleasant. We don't fight...often...or with any
long, drawn out anger. And of course, with a Sunny side Outlook, I do
spin my letters toward the Norman Rockwell Beautiful America view. My
family and friends know well enough that I see the flaws and the
suffering in our world, without my including them in my Season's
Greetings. My goal, as I said, is to help build family memories that
are happy memories. I do that, not because it's what we all do, but
because I had so many joyful family gatherings. They gave me the
foundation I needed as our family went through very hard times.
You'll notice that my elder sister is nowhere to be found in that
letter, and seldom in any of them. She is a bitter, negative person,
filled with anger and hatred, blaming everyone but herself for the
troubles she's brought down upon her own head...and the heads of her
five children.
Well, enough of this blather. Time to get out of the office and build
some new happy memories!
Carl Jarvis
On 7/12/19, Miriam Vieni <miriamvieni@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Carl,
In those letters, I'm sure you never mentioned any negative things that were
happening in your lives, no money problems, no big family arguments, no
problems at work. Yes, if a family member died, that would be included. But
basically, you were not just catching people up on the news. You were
sending them a cheerful newsletter. That's what everyone does
And these internet relationships? Most of us are very cautious about what we
say about our personal lives, even on this list. There are things that
neither you nor I will ever share with other list members or with each other
because, in an internet relationship, we can easily hide things that the
people in our real lives, know. We can present whatever picture we choose.
And many of us, people who've become familiar names on an email list, just
disappear one day. We have no way of knowing why. And because these are
virtual relationships, not real ones, we don't have any right to know why or
any way to find out. We don't know each other's families or friends. People
may disappear because they don't want to interact with us anymore or because
they become sick, or because they die.
Miriam .
-----Original Message-----
From: blind-democracy-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx On Behalf Of Carl Jarvis
Sent: Friday, July 12, 2019 8:47 PM
To: blind-democracy@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: [blind-democracy] Re: The Good Old Daze
I'll never say never, but it will be a cold day in Hell before I go on Face
Book. My friends are those people I've known for years and call them or
drop around to visit. I do claim a number of email acquaintances, including
Miriam, Roger, Bob, Charlie, Penny, Frank and a number of others whose names
snuck to the back of my brain. But most of what I write is what I'm feeling
at the moment. If I stretch the facts a bit...well, tough! But talking
about Christmas Letters!
There was a time when I said I'd never torture folks with Christmas Letters.
I had a couple of aunts who used those letters to shame us who were not
Believers. And they loved to brag about their "personal relationship" with
Jesus. I figured that was fine and good for them, but they were fooling
themselves if they thought they'd bring me and my folks to our senses.
But after Cathy and I moved into our house, in 1995, I began writing an
annual letter. I suppose I might have staged some events in a favorable
light, but mostly it was just catching folks up on our activities...letting
them know that we were still hanging around.
Carl Jarvis
On 7/12/19, Miriam Vieni <miriamvieni@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
A lot of people use Facebook to present an idealized picture of
themselves and their families. After all, that's what Facebook is, a
place for public advertisements. It's like the Christmas letters
people send each year. Those letters are never true representations of
what has actually been going on.
Miriam
-----Original Message-----
From: blind-democracy-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx On Behalf Of Carl Jarvis
Sent: Friday, July 12, 2019 2:54 PM
To: blind-democracy@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: [blind-democracy] Re: The Good Old Daze
Mother taught my two sisters and me how to darn our socks at an early
age.
She also taught us to do simple mending. While I can't do justice to
a pair of slacks, I can put patches on jeans or old work pants, and
get a few more miles of wear out of them. Even old jeans can be cut
into patches which protect the knees when weeding the garden. Cathy
and I taught the kids to do some of the basics, but not to the degree
our mother's taught us. My kids are basically frugal...although they like
to joke and call me Cheap!
I personally believe that we made a sad mistake, believing that making
life easier was the same as making life better. My mother and grandma
wrote each other at least twice a week, and I remember the joy mother
received each time she sat down to read the latest news from home. I
never feel that sort of happiness on the faces of people today, as
they read their Face Book messages.
Carl Jarvis
On 7/12/19, Miriam Vieni <miriamvieni@xxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
This is absolutely wonderful. I do wish that I could send it to
everyone. My contribution is that my very smart, tech savvy young
home health aid mentioned that there's a tiny rip on the quilt that
covers my bed, apparently caused by Madeline's claws. I asked if she
knew how to mend a rip and she said that she never repaired any rips
in clothing. If there is a small tear in something, she just throws
it out and buys a new one. I have memories of my mother darning my
father's socks. My home health aid works 2 jobs to make ends meet.
She's 27. So I asked my 47 year old daughter if she ever mends rips
in clothing and she doesn't either. But of course, this dream of
convenience and a world in which all one's needs will be met by
artificial intelligence, a world in which you never repair anything
old, but always replace it with something new, has been sold to us by
the same people who convinced us that we could only preserve our
nation's honor by ruling the world.
Miriam
-----Original Message-----
From: blind-democracy-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx On Behalf Of Carl Jarvis
Sent: Friday, July 12, 2019 11:30 AM
To: blind-democracy <blind-democracy@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Subject: [blind-democracy] The Good Old Daze
Maybe we should consider "Returning to America's Greatness".
Checking out at the store, the young cashier suggested to the much
older lady that she should bring her own grocery bags, because
plastic bags are not good for the environment.
The woman apologized to the young girl and explained, "We didn't have
this 'green thing' back in my earlier days."
The young clerk responded, "That's our problem today. Your generation
did not care enough to save our environment for future generations."
The older lady said that she was right our generation didn't have
the "green thing" in its day. The older lady went on to explain:
Back then, we returned milk bottles, soda bottles and beer bottles to
the store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed and
sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and
over. So they really were recycled. But we didn't have the "green thing"
back in our day.
Grocery stores bagged our groceries in brown paper bags that we
reused for numerous things. Most memorable besides household garbage
bags was the use of brown paper bags as book covers for our school
books. This was to ensure that public property (the books provided
for our use by the
school) was not defaced by our scribbling. Then we were able to
personalize our books on the brown paper bags. But, too bad we didn't
do the "green thing" back then.
We walked up stairs because we didn't have an escalator in every
store and office building. We walked to the grocery store and didn't
climb into a 300-horsepower machine every time we had to go two
blocks. But she was right. We didn't have the "green thing" in our day.
Back then we washed the baby's diapers because we didn't have the
throw away kind. We dried clothes on a line, not in an
energy-gobbling machine burning up 220 volts. Wind and solar power
really did dry our clothes back in our early days. Kids got
hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always
brand-new clothing. But that young lady is right; we didn't have the
"green thing" back in our day.
Back then we had one TV, or radio, in the house -- not a TV in every
room.
And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief (remember
them?), not a screen the size of the state of Montana. In the kitchen
we blended and stirred by hand because we didn't have electric
machines to do everything for us. When we packaged a fragile item to
send in the mail, we used wadded up old newspapers to cushion it, not
Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap. Back then, we didn't fire up an
engine and burn gasoline just to cut the lawn. We used a push mower
that ran on human power. We exercised by working so we didn't need to
go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity.
But she's right; we didn't have the "green thing" back then.
We drank from a fountain when we were thirsty instead of using a cup
or a plastic bottle every time we had a drink of water. We refilled
writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and we replaced
the razor blade in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor
just because the blade got dull. But we didn't have the "green thing"
back then.
Back then, people took the streetcar or a bus and kids rode their
bikes to school or walked instead of turning their moms into a
24-hour taxi service in the family's $45,000 SUV or van, which cost
what a whole house did before the "green thing." We had one
electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a
dozen appliances.
And we didn't need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed
from satellites 23,000 miles out in space in order to find the
nearest burger joint.
But isn't it sad the current generation laments how wasteful we old
folks were just because we didn't have the "green thing" back then?
Please forward this on to another selfish old person who needs a
lesson in conservation from a smart ass young person.
We don't like being old in the first place, so it doesn't take much
