=/\= To Feel And To Be =/\= (part two) (NOTE: This log contains adult themes and material. It is not pornographic, but it is explicit and borders on graphic. In addition to sexually oriented material, it is based on mature psychological themes. If this bothers you, please do not scroll down to read it.) Shaking from the unaccustomed feelings, Kaera clung to him, trying to catch her breath. "No one ever did that before," she whispered, trying to let him feel the newness of what she was experiencing. He watched her for a moment, enjoying the reaction she was having to what he had done. He decided to play a bit more. "Perhaps I should give lessons to more people, then." But before she could respond to his statement, he leaned in again and kissed her neck where he had been caressing her a few moments before. Kaera's knees went weak, and she moaned a little. The physical pleasure of his kisses made her dizzy. And made her want him, she realized wonderingly even as her legs buckled under her. Cam felt her buckle against him and he caught her as she started to go down. "Easy there... We don't want to cause an overload, now." He teased her gently. He led her to a chair. "Sit.... we should have a drink before the champagne gets warm." He left her sitting alone for a moment as he went to retrieve the tray that was still sitting in the replicator slot. When he arrived he found that it was too late and the champagne and strawberries he had ordered had gone warm, so he recycled them and then ordered new ones that were perfectly chilled. He turned around to find her watching him with a strange, he thought, look in her eye. As he brought them back to her he asked, "What is it?" Catching her breath, Kaera tried her best to keep from over-analyzing what was going on, but that was difficult. It was true that she had never felt desire in herself before. She had never before chosen to be with a man. Her prior experience had been of surrendering herself in desperation, giving men what they wanted in order to survive, and only managing to put up with the pain and shame by vicariously feeling their pleasure in the act. She looked up at Cam as he returned to her with a tray, not sure how to explain her thoughts. "It's different," she murmured. He could feel there was more there than she was telling. As he started to set out the champagne for them, he asked her for more. "Different, of course. It's always different. But the question is, different how?" He poured her a glass of the wine and picked up a strawberry, offering it to her. She turned to sit on one hip with her legs crossed as she accepted the drink and fruit from him. "I wish it was something I could explain without words," she said softly, her frustration obvious. "I can understand if you are afraid. It must be so new to you." He smiled at her as he took a strawberry for himself, taking a bite out of it and then sipping some of the wine. "I only want to know you, Kaera. I don't want to hurt you. I am not like any other man you have known." He offered her another berry but forced her to eat it out of his hand. Kaera chewed and swallowed the berry and took a sip of the champagne before replying. "No, you are not like any other man I've known," she agreed, and added in a whisper, "You would never take a terrified 15-year-old for your own pleasure, simply because she was starving and would give herself in exchange for food." "No." He could feel her pain at the memory of what that first man had done to her. Had forced her to do. "I don't know anyone who could be so.... inhuman." He sipped his drink again. "With all you have had to do to be able to eat, can you enjoy food?" He brought a memory of a meal to his mind to share with her. He smiled at her, "Can you feel the memory?" "A little," she said slowly. "I don't think I enjoy it in the same way most people do. I'm learning, but it's slow." She was so serious. She had always been serious, but even more so with her experiences after the end of the war. He nodded. Cam was seated on the floor in front and to the side of her chair. He ran a hand down her nearer leg as he spoke. "You don't have to enjoy it the same. You just have to learn to enjoy it." He smiled up at her and sipped some more of his drink and took another strawberry. He finished off his glass then and took one more strawberry from the bowl. "Do you like the berries?" Kaera nodded. "They're good. And... it's nice to just sit like this. To not rush, and get to know each other a little more." She smiled, her dove-grey complexion darkening a bit as she blushed. "It is nice to just sit and talk," he agreed. He left his hand on her leg, enjoying the touch. He could tell she was, too. He smiled at her blush. "You look so lovely when you do that." She blushed even more and drank the last of her champagne. "I would like very much to kiss you again," she said very quietly, her smile shy. "It was extremely pleasant." "Thank you, but I thought you were enjoying the strawberries." He teased. His smile was so broad that even a Ferengi would have been able to tell he was teasing her. "I have enjoyed them," Kaera agreed, realizing he was teasing but at the same time replying seriously. He picked up another berry as he chuckled. "But perhaps we can enhance our pleasure even more." He mused as he pinched the stem out of the berry. Rising to his knees before her he placed the berry half into his mouth and leaned in to share the berry with her. She was startled when he moved to offer her part of the berry that was in his mouth. It seemed an odd way to kiss, but she leaned toward him to try it. He saw her hesitate but then go forward. He leaned in further and he shared the berry with her and a very sweet kiss with it. When the kiss was broken he smiled as he chewed the rest of his half of the berry. Kissing Cam gave Kaera flutters in the pit of her stomach. Was that desire? It felt like it might be. She watched him wonderingly as she finished chewing her part of the berry. "See... the best of both worlds." He was still grinning at her playfully. He could sense her wonder. "Ask me what you wish to know, Kaera." He was still kneeling before her as she was semi-lounging in the chair. He dropped his hand to her leg again, caressing her smooth lower leg. She just shook her head and smiled at him. And let him feel exactly what she was feeling... the flutters, the want, the tingles through her skin where he touched her. And the feeling that she wanted to be closer to him, to lie beside him, skin against skin, exploring... He could feel what she wanted to do and smiled at her. He leaned in and kissed her again and without breaking the kiss helped her to stand. He ran his hands down her arms so they rested on her hips. When the kiss was finally broken, he smiled down at her. "You taste like strawberries." "So do you," she breathed. Her whole body tingled, and there was a buzzing sensation in the pit of her stomach that seemed connected to parts lower down. It was all new, but very pleasant. And now he was allowing her to sense his arousal as well. It wasn't at all like her previous experiences. Those, she was beginning to realize, had not been intimacy at all. There was another word for them entirely, one that was unpleasant to contemplate. Kaera very deliberately pushed that thought away and focused on the intoxicating sensations of the moment. Cam too was enjoying the feelings she was creating in him. He was enjoying not only his own arousal but hers as well. He could tell that she was comparing things in her mind. He leaned down to her again and kissed her while he almost effortlessly lifted her up so he wasn't bent over but standing almost strait up. "Are we communicating now?" she murmured against his lips in her own attempt at levity. And then concentrated entirely on kissing him and the amazing things that were happening to her body. He chuckled into her mouth causing deep vibrations. Between kisses he answered. "I think quite well... don't you?" He began to kiss down her neck still holing her tightly with her feet off the floor. It was a little disconcerting to be held like this, but Kaera just tried to relax into his embrace. It was hard to relax, though, when he was kissing her neck ridges. "Do you know what that does to me?" she gasped, and clutched at him dizzily. Setting her down gently he chuckled again. "Yes.... I can feel exactly what it is doing to you. Why do you think I am doing it?" He went back to his kissing as a hand slipped back around her finding the zipper to her dress and slid it down. Through the dizziness, she sought to find a way to give him the same sort of feelings he was giving her. Her fingertips slid through his long silky hair and down his neck to his strong shoulders and traced the muscles of his chest through his shirt. And she realized as her dress slipped from her shoulders and his hands stroked the scales of her bare back, that he was aroused through his own actions. She still wanted to do something, though. His head fell back involuntarily as she traced his chest. He could feel the heat from her fingers even through his shirt. He was feeling his own tingles and stirrings as he slipped her dress from her frame and eased it lower until she was able to step out of it. His shirt, which looked like a pullover at first, turned out to have a hidden cling-seam down the front. Kaera laid it open, drawing her fingers down his bare chest, curious at the fine fuzz of hair there. She knew Terrans and some other races had hair all over their bodies, but had never experienced it before. Through the mist of arousal, she wondered what he thought of the ways in which she was different from his race. She didn't sense any revulsion, only desire and arousal as she put her arms around his neck again, pressing her bare breasts against the light hair of his chest. She was unlike any other humanoid he had been with. He found the scaled layers of her skin to be surprisingly sensitive. He rather enjoyed he tough feel of her skin. And he found her body to be quite... stimulating. They both knew where this was heading, so between kisses he suggested, "Perhaps we should find a more comfortable place to explore some more." And looked over to the bed.