[thebigjewel] Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - January 14, 2009

  • From: "The Big Jewel" <list@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: <thebigjewel@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • Date: Wed, 14 Jan 2009 20:19:04 -0700 (MST)

Welcome to The Big Jewel, where no matter how many lame sequels are added
to the franchise, we will never ever forget our four beloved green heroes,
the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Neither has our good friend Megan Amram,
who insists that the actual number of turtles is five:

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

By Megan Amram

(Little is known about the fifth Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle, Picasso.)

MICHELANGELO: Totally rad -- this toxic waste has made us into, like,

PICASSO: Bros, I don't feel so great after all that toxic waste.

LEONARDO: I'm stronger than ever and I can easily wield this Japanese
sword I just found. How about you, Picasso? What's your special new power?

PICASSO: I'm nauseous, and all my hair is falling out...

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