[ratpack] Re: Fwd: THE LAWS
- From: John Christensen <johncgg@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: ratpack@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Thu, 27 Aug 2009 21:00:08 -0500
I married a Murphy..... All these laws apply double to me.
JC
---
John Christensen
Saint Charles, IL
On Thu, Aug 27, 2009 at 10:19 AM, JOHN W WEIBEL <marce.weibel@xxxxxxx>wrote:
> May I add one more LAW
>
> We are familiar with Murphy's Law, but probably did not know that Murphy
> was an
>
> *OPTIMIST*
>
>
> John W
>
> ------------------------------
> Date: Thu, 27 Aug 2009 15:04:21 +0000
> From: humminboid@xxxxxxxxxxx
> To: ratpack@xxxxxxxxxxxxx; unclejohn6969@xxxxxxxxxxx;
> wearethebaum2003@xxxxxxxxx; brettjennifer1@xxxxxxx; bloodred_moon@xxxxxxx;
> dahmen3@xxxxxxx
> Subject: [ratpack] Fwd: THE LAWS
>
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> THE LAWS
>
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> THE LAWS OF ULTIMATE REALITY *
>
> &** **Law of Mechanical Repair *
> After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch
> and you'll have to pee..*
>
> &** **Law of Gravity** *
> Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.*
>
> &** Law of Probability** *
> The probability of being watched is directly
> proportional to the stupidity of your act.*
>
> &** **Law of Random Numbers** *
> If you dial a wrong number, you never get
> a busy signal and someone always answers.*
>
> &** **Law of the Alibi*
> If you tell the boss you were late for work
> because you had a flat tire, the very next
> morning you will have a flat tire.*
>
> &** Variation Law** *
> If you change traffic lanes, the one you were in will always move faster
> than the one you are in now (works every time).*
>
> &** Law of the Bath *
> When the body is fully immersed in water,
> the telephone rings.*
>
> &** Law of Close Encounters** *
> The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you
> are with someone you don't want to be seen with.*
>
> &** Law of the Result** *
> When you try to prove to someone that
> a machine won't work, it will.*
>
> &** Law of Biomechanics *
> The severity of the itch is inversely
> proportional to the reach.*
>
> &** Law of the Theatre*
> At any event, the people whose seats are
> furthest from the aisle arrive last.*
>
> &** The Starbucks Law *
> As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot
> coffee, your boss will ask you to do
> something which will last until the coffee is cold.*
>
> &** **Murphy's Law of Lockers *
> If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent
> lockers.*
>
> &** Law of Physical Surfaces *
> The chances of an open-faced jam sandwich landing face down on a floor
> covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.
> *
>
> &** **Brown's Law of Physical Appearance *
> If the shoe fits, it's ugly.*
>
> &** **Wilson** 's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy *
> As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making
> it.*
>
> &** Doctors' Law *
> If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the
> time you get there you'll feel better. Don't make an appointment and you'll
> stay sick.
> *
> &** **Law of Logical Argument *
> Anything is possible if you don't know
> what you are talking about.
>
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