[projectaon] Re: Books 1-7 Clean-up
- From: "Jonathan Blake" <blake.jon@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: projectaon@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Tue, 30 Sep 2008 09:43:15 -0700
On Tue, Sep 30, 2008 at 3:39 AM, Simon Osborne <outspaced@xxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
> More pestering, I'm afraid, but only a little. It's an exercise in cleaning
> up the first seven books, since they require the least amount of work.
>
> ----------
>
> 4: The Chasm of Doom:
>
> 272: "You smash feet first into a large river boulder."
>
> * feet first -> feet-first ?
Right (at least according to our Manual of Style).
> 5: Shadow on the Sand:
>
> 124: "You leap from the window ledge and crash feet first into the
> guards..."
>
> * feet first -> feet-first ?
Right.
> 234: "In a complete daze you tumble and spin, totally unaware of whether you
> are falling head or feet first"
>
> * head or feet first -> head- or feet-first ? [probably not]
Right.
> 7: Castle Death:
>
> 27: [Jan Charvát: If you possess Jewelled Mace, you should get a bonus
> +5 CS in this fight (this enemy is evil spectre, and so is Dhorgaan in book
> 5)]
>
> (Book 5 Section 253: "Out of the darkness, a green whorl of vapour is
> forming slowly into the shape of a glistening, serpent-like monster. A grey
> mist issues forth from the Darklord's mouth, floating towards the core of
> this horror, infusing it with the power of death. The serpent writhes and
> convulses as the grey mist fills its body, changing it from a dream-like
> illusion into a living nightmare. ... If you possess a Jewelled Mace, you
> may add 5 to your COMBAT SKILL for the duration of the combat, for it is an
> enchanted weapon, especially effective against such a creature."
>
> vs.
>
> Book 7 Section 27: "A shape is taking form in the doorway, a shadowy figure
> with flaming red eyes. An icy chill grips your heart as it sweeps past you
> with a swirling rush of wind. You spin round to see it hovering in the sky,
> its shadowy hand now gripping a great spiked ball and chain. It shrieks an
> unearthly cry, and the ball whistles down towards your unprotected face." //
> Section 38: "Your psychic senses tell you that what you see before you is an
> illusion. The Oudakon is a spectral force ...")
>
> * I don't think these creatures are all that similar, so I would think this
> can be rejected.
I don't think we have anything authoritative to say here. The most we
could do is suggest that the bonus might be applicable here.
> 73: Kakush vases -> Kakushian vases [so: cf. Section 293: Anarian] [jb:
> The only precedent specific to Kakush that I can find is in 299: "Kakush
> mercenaries".]
> 199: Kakush mercenary -> Kakushian mercenary [so: cf. Section 293:
> Anarian] [jb: I'm not sure this is strictly necessary.]
>
> * See: Sommerlund vs. Sommlending
Cf. "New York cabbie", "Boston clam chowder" :)
> 257: Can the Towel from the Bathhouse in Book 5 be used instead of a
> Blanket? [Francis Legault]
>
> * This makes sense. But should it be footnoted or added directly into the
> section text?
Footnoted I guess. Are there any other Blanket-like Items we should mention? ;)
> 322: If you wish to step over the beam of light and continue along the
> passage, turn to 88. If you choose to walk through the beam, turn to 240. ->
> If you wish to step over the beam of light and continue along the passage,
> turn to 240. If you choose to walk through the beam, turn to 88. [jc: I
> think there are reversed references. LW should be hurted, if he choose to go
> through the beam, but he's hurted when he step over the beam. ]
>
> * Any thoughts?
I've always suspected the same, but Zhada's a crazy guy. Who knows
what he's up to in his madhouse?
> 350: Dessi's evil shadow -> Zhada's evil shadow [SO: The original wording
> sort of makes sense, but I think this would be an improvement]
>
> * I spotted this when reading through the new Mongoose edition; I
> double-checked to see if the text had been changed, but our edition says
> exactly the same.
I can see where you're coming from. I read it as equivalent to "the
evil shadow of Dessi" which makes sense to me.
--
Jon
~~~~~~
Manage your subscription at //www.freelists.org/list/projectaon
Other related posts:
