[CTS] OT - Best "Out-of-Office" Email Auto-Replies

  • From: "DesignWorks" <tchapman@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: <computertalkshop@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • Date: Fri, 18 Feb 2005 09:24:02 -0600

1: I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get 
the position. Be prepared for my mood.

2: I'm not really out of the office. I'm just ignoring you.

3: You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the 
office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.

4: Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain removed so 
that I may be promoted to management.

5: I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me 
until I return from vacation on 4/18. Please be patient and your mail will be 
deleted in the order it was received.

6: Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the 
first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.

7: The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable 
to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending 
again.'(The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see how many 
in-duh-viduals did this over and over).

8: Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You 
are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in 
approximately 19 weeks.

9: Please reply to this e-mail so I will know that you got this message. I am 
on holiday. Your e-mail has been deleted.

10: Hi. I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by your PC for 
my response.

11: Hi! I'm busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Don't bother to leave 
me any messages.

12: I've run away to join a different circus.

AND, FINALLY, THIS ONE TAKES THE CAKE:

13: I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for medical reasons. When 
I return, please refer to me as 'Loretta' instead of 'Steve'

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  • » [CTS] OT - Best "Out-of-Office" Email Auto-Replies