<USS Avalon> Re: A Rose In A Fisted Glove Moreya, Skyler
- From: Rowanna Darkwolf <rowannadarkwolf@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: avalon@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Mon, 4 May 2009 16:55:01 -0700 (PDT)
beautiful but sad...still, it's good not to be alone. Well done.
--- On Mon, 5/4/09, CmdrSkyler@xxxxxxx <CmdrSkyler@xxxxxxx> wrote:
From: CmdrSkyler@xxxxxxx <CmdrSkyler@xxxxxxx>
Subject: <USS Avalon> A Rose In A Fisted Glove Moreya, Skyler
To: avalon@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Date: Monday, May 4, 2009, 4:49 PM
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A Rose In a Fisted Glove
Moreya, Skyler
2009:04:30
Moreya sat in front of the comm unit in her quarters, staring at the darkened
screen. Though, when after an unknown interval had passed, it occurred to her
that she had not been staring at the screen so much as through it. Through it
and beyond to another planet, far away from where the Avalon was now bound. To
her homeworld, Delta IV. She had been too long away.
Too long away. And now, too late for one being whose memory had lain quiet
next to Moreya's heart. Quiet, uncomplaining, and now ... forever silent.
And yet ... there was a beginning at the same time. Two messages had come
through, almost at the same instant.
She could feel the pull of home as surely as if there was a lasso around her
chest. She nearly wept in desperation, wanting to heed it.
But as it always did, the other pull held her fast. What of her duty to
Starfleet, she thought. Always, it was duty. And now as much as ever, could
not be cast aside.
Still, even duty didn't demand she deal with all this in isolation. That way
lay madness, especially for Deltans, those most social of sentients.
Giving herself a gentle but visible shake, she concentrated a moment to
reassert control over her pheremone release. Then she consulted the
chronometer. She'd been lost in her reverie longer than she would have liked,
but she should still have enough time to reach Skyler before she was asleep.
She paused before tapping the chime at Skyler's door, composing herself. She
didn’t want to hide her emotional tempest; she just didn't want it to be
overwhelming. Not to mention the paradoxical mingling of grief and joy was
going to be confusing to anyone. It was confusing to Moreya.
She pressed the chime and waited a moment.
Sitting alone in her quarters, Skyler sat contemplating her current situation.
Her love for Moreya, her disillusion with Starfleet, and her confusion with her
family or lack thereof. The sound of the chime broke the silence.
She knew who she hoped it was, but it was hard to tell who it would be. Still
sitting she responded, "Come in." She waited to see who her late night visitor
was.
Moreya stepped in, walking over to Skyler and pulling her into a hug. Before
Skyler could say anything, Moreya let her go and sat cross-legged on the
floor. "I've had some news from home," she said. "Some news of joy and some
news of grief. But all of it news I cannot ignore."
Feeling Moreya's arms around her always made Skyler feel good. However, this
time she could sense something was wrong. Walking across the room, Skyler went
to the replicator and made two glasses of tea. She took one for herself and
handed the other to her friend. She then sat across from her on the floor.
"Tell me, my friend. What is this news? Is there anything I can do to help?"
Moreya had done so much for Skyler that she wanted to repay the favor.
"I can ask only one thing, dear one, and it is this. I must ask your
forgiveness, for I must tell you something that might trouble you, something I
should have told you before."
Skyler knew as soon as Moreya had to ask for forgiveness that this was not
going to be a good thing. She sat quietly, letting the coolness of condensation
on the glass run down her fingers. Her thoughts were running wild, and not
necessarily in a good way.
"I have had news from home. My sister, my only sibling, has had a child. My
first nephew."
"A nephew. Congratulations. You must be very happy for your sister and your
family." Skyler thought briefly of the niece she would never know. A sister
long lost to her.
"But ... there is more." She took a long pull off the glass of tea, for once
hardly tasting it. "About someone as dear to me as you are .... someone I had
hoped you would be able to meet one day soon."
"I hope to meet those important to you,” Skyler said. “If they are important
to you then they are the same to me."
Moreya flashed a brief smile. "You are kind, dear one." Then she finally said
the words she would have given anything to deny. "This someone ... has died."
A death. That was something Skyler was familiar with. More than she cared to
be. "I am sorry for your loss." Reaching over she gently touched Moreya's hand.
A slight nod was all Moreya could allow herself, to acknowledge the touch. Too
much more needed to be said, and quickly, before the pain overwhelmed her.
"You remember your medical studies? Deltan biology? That we require many
matings over a long span of time in order to bear offspring?"
"I do. And If I didn't, you have made it quite clear to me." She continued to
hold Moreya's hand, holding it tighter as her friend and lover spoke.
"I had a mate. He has just died. I should have told you of him sooner, and I
am sorry. I hope you can forgive me."
"There’s nothing to forgive; you should know that. What can I do to help you? I
want to be with you to help you through this ordeal. You shouldn't be alone,
not now." Putting her glass down, Skyler pulled Moreya close. She held her in
her arms and gently caressed her head. "Stay here tonight and we will figure
out what to do in the morning."
Moreya relaxed into Skyler's embrace. "I wish I could leave. I feel so close
to just resigning my commission and walking away. Starfleet needs me, though,
doesn't it? But for tonight, I will stay here, and gladly." She closed her
eyes.
"I am glad you have not resigned your commission as Starfleet still does need
you." As do I. Standing, Skyler gently helped Moryea to her feet. "Come, the
floor is no place for you to sleep. Let me help you to the bed where you can
relax in a bit more comfort."
With an arm around the Deltan’s waist, Skyler led her to the bedroom. Once
there, she gently helped Moreya out of her gown and pulled the bed covers back.
She tenderly laid Moreya on the bed and pulled the covers back over her. "Get
some rest my love. I will be back shortly to check on you."
Before leaving she ordered the computer to increase the temperature of the room
to that of Delta IV. She wanted to make her friend as comfortable as possible.
She stood in the doorway and watched as Moreya seemed to relax somewhat. After
a few minutes Skyler made her way back into the living area and her computer.
She had a great deal to think about.
Sitting at her desk, Skyler stared at the computer. She didn't know what to
think about what Moreya had told her. The fact that she would even consider
resigning from Starfleet made her realize how tenuous her hold was on Moreya.
Not that she was anyone’s possesion. Skyler just assumed Moreya would always be
around in one way or another.
What would I have done had she indeed left Starfleet and returned home? Would
she want me to go with her? Would I be willing to resign my commission? So many
questions with little or few answers.
Looking back at the computer she noticed she had a message. When she had
finished reading it, Skyler was in total shock. In a flash, she threw
everything off the desk and onto the floor. Why was this happening? Now, of all
times.
After destroying just about everything on her desk, Skyler got up and started
to pace. First Moreya was going to leave and now Tery has gone. Again. With no
reason why. Just a note saying she was sorry but she had to leave. What on
earth did I do to deserve this? What am I being punished for?
She finally found a dark corner and sat on the floor, holding her knees to her
chest and her head on her knees. She started rocking back and forth as the
tears started to flow down her face.
The crashing of items being thrown from Skyler's desk brought a drowsing Moreya
to full wakefulness. She slipped out of the bed and looked out into the main
room of Skyler's quarters, watching as her friend raged, then paced, then
slipped down into a ball in one corner. Quietly she crossed the room, knelt
down in front of Skyler, and said quietly, "The floor is no place for you to
sleep either. What has happened, dear one?"
Skyler just sat there rocking and crying. Her emotions were raw. More than they
had ever been. After a few minutes, she looked up at Moreya. "She's gone.
Again. Everyone always leaves. There must be something wrong with me. What am I
doing wrong, Moreya? What? You were thinking of leaving Starfleet, and I
understand your reasons. You have every right to leave. Your family needs you.
You need your family. You don't need a leech like me."
Moreya took Skyler gently by the shoulders, looked straight into her eyes, and
said, very slowly, "Leech, my left tit."
When she was sure that she'd thus gotten Skyler's full attention, she said,
“Dear one, neither my misadventures nor Tery's have anything to do with you.
Coincidence, poor timing, a fault in karma ... all of these are possible, but
none of them have the least bit to do with how much we love you, nor whether
you are deserving of love or not. And yes, I have my reasons for wanting to
leave Starfleet ... and my family does need me. But Starfleet needs me more.
And so do you."
Skyler looked up at Moreya with tears in her eyes. "Yes I do need you, but your
family needs you more. Starfleet needs you but neither they nor I have the
right to keep you from going home. Even if it is only for a short period. As
for what I need that is not the issue. Your happiness is the issue."
Looking at the Deltan before her, Skyler knew what she wanted at that
particular moment. She needed to feel wanted, needed … No. Desired. Yet she
was not going to do anything to jeopardize her relationship with Moreya. It
would be taking her pain on losing Tery out on her and that would not be fair.
Damn she was an emotional mess and weakling.
Moreya gathered Skyler into her arms, letting her head rest against the
Deltan's shoulder. "We're all in this together, beloved. My family will do
quite well until we both can go and join them. In the meantime, there are
others on this ship who need us. We shall just have to take what comfort we
can from one another, yes?" She looked down at Skyler with a twinkle in her
eye, allowing a knowing smile to play across her face.
Skyler looked up at Moreya and saw the twinkle in her eyes. No matter the
circumstance she always had a twinkle. "Yes, I think that we can do that."
Standing she stood next to Moreya, cupping her face in her hand, "Sometimes I
wonder what I ever did without you in my life."
Well there's a rose in a fisted glove
And the eagle flies with the dove
And if you can't be with the one you love, honey
Love the one you're with
--Stephen Stills
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