* This week Neil Pasricha -- recently honored as Time Magazine's "Most Annoying Man of the Century" -- irritates the living Hell out of us with the literary equivalent of head lice. Feel free to scratch your head. Thanks for reading and have a great week. --- 10 Increasingly Annoying Short Stories By Neil Pasricha A Short Story, About Something Really Annoying * You accidentally get locked inside your bathroom, which is full of mosquitoes. * The mosquitoes keep trying to bite you but, just as you start trying to swat them, you realize that they may become your only source of food as the time inside this small bathroom wears on. * You also realize that you are the mosquitoes' only source of food and they will die if you stop them from drinking your blood, possibly depriving you of food in the future. So you take off your clothes, sit tightly on the toilet with your eyes clenched, and suffer mosquito bite after mosquito bite, just to fatten up the darned insects, so that you will have something to survive on when you begin to starve to death in a few days. * Then, a couple hours later, when you're covered in mosquito bites from head to toe, your buddy Ralph comes by and unlocks the bathroom door. Moral: Do not lock yourself in a bathroom. And that's just one of the stories. For the full article, please visit: http://www.thebigjewel.com/reallyannoying/ -- To subscribe or unsubscribe from The Big Jewel's Hilarious Weekly Email please fill out form T-44A, found at the back of the March, 2003 issue of Forms Magazine.