[lit-ideas] Test- ignore
- From: Donal McEvoy <donalmcevoyuk@xxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: "lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx" <lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Sat, 31 May 2014 13:43:29 +0100 (BST)
Test
On Friday, 30 May 2014, 2:38, Lawrence Helm <lawrencehelm@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Bernal Diaz confesses his fear
Though we have only his own testimony before us here, I have no doubt but that
Bernal Diaz was an extremely brave and effective soldier, and yet . . .
“It is now a long time since we fought these terrible battles, which continued
without intermission day and night, and I cannot be too thankful to the
Almighty for my preservation; and now I must relate something extraordinary
which befel myself. The reader will remember above that I stated how we could
see theMexicanssacrificingour unfortunate countrymen; how they ripped open
their breasts, tore out their palpitating hearts, and offered them to their
abominable idols. This sight made a horrible impression on my mind, yet no one
must imagine that I was wanting either in courage or determination; on the
contrary, I fearlessly exposed myself in every engagement to the greatest
dangers, for I felt that I had courage. It was my ambition at that time to pass
for a good soldier, and I certainly bore the reputation of being one; and what
any of our men ventured, I ventured also, as everyone who was present can
testify; yet I must confess that I felt terribly
agitated in spirit when I each day saw some of my companions being put to
death in the dreadful manner above mentioned, and I was seized with terror at
the thought that I might have to share a similar fate! Indeedthe Mexicans had
on two different occasions laid hold of me, and it was only through the great
mercy of God that I escaped from their grasp.
I could no longer divest myself of the thoughts of ending my life in this
shocking manner, and each time, before we made an attack upon the enemy, a cold
shudder ran through my body, and I felt oppressed by excessive melancholy. It
was then I fell upon my knees, and commended myself to the protection of God
and the blessed Virgin; and from my prayers I rushed straightway into the
battle, and all fear instantly vanished. This feeling appeared the more
unaccountable to me, since I had encountered so many perils at sea, fought so
many sanguinary battles in the open field, been present on so many dangerous
marches through forests and mountains,stormed and defended so many towns; for
there were very few great battles fought by our troops in New Spain in which I
was not present. In these perils of various natures I never felt the fear I did
subsequent to that time when the Mexicans captured sixty-two of our men, and we
were compelled to see them thus
slaughtered one by one, without being able to render them assistance. I leave
those cavaliers to judge who are acquainted with war, and know from experience
what dangers a man is exposed to in battle, whether it was want of courage
which raised this feeling in me. Certain it is that I each day pictured to
myself the whole extent of the danger into which I was obliged to plunge
myself; nevertheless, I fought with my accustomed bravery, and all sensation of
fear fled from me as soon as I espied the enemy. Lastly, I must acquaint the
reader that the Mexicans never killed our men in battle if they could possibly
avoid it, but merely wounded them, so far as to render them incapable of
defending themselves, in order that they might take as many of them alive as
possible, to have the satisfaction of sacrificing them to their warrior-god
Huitzilopochtli, after they had amused themselves by making them dance before
him, adorned with feathers.[Bernal Diaz,The
Conquest of New Spain,Kindle locations 10040-10063]
Comment: Was the fervent prayingDiazengaged in before battletaken into
consideration by Nicholas Wade? Not as far as I’ve read. Wade describes
religion as providing a personal overseer (sort of like Freud’s Superego) who
would have kepthimapprised of how he ought to behave in the comingbattle, but
would this overseer also provide Diaz with the strength to accomplish that
behaviorand more importantly rescue him if he got in over his head? Diazthought
so, and he did after all survive, and since he wrote his book when he was in
his seventies, he had made it into old age with nothing changing his mind.
Diaz was obviously a brave andavery-effective soldier and yet he felt fear as a
result of seeing the torture the Aztecs engaged in before killing the 62 men
captured from Cortes’s divisionearlier. In the modern-day American military
this sort of thing is made light of. Soldiers going into battlewill“normally”
have the jitters, but once the fighting actually starts, they are told, they’ll
be okay; which is in effect what Diaz describes as hisbehavior. He feels a bit
guilty about the fear, but the modern soldier is told that fear is okay as long
as it isn’t incapacitating, as long as it doesn’t prevent the soldier from
doing his job. Bravery consists in overcoming that fear, and after all, there
are comrades to the right and to the left. One doesn’t want to let them down
now does one?
Lawrence
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