[lit-ideas] Re: Bridges of Madison County
- From: "Andy Amago" <aamago@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Thu, 26 Jan 2006 21:56:52 -0500
---- Original Message -----
From: Paul Stone
To: lit-ideas@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sent: 1/26/2006 4:57:24 PM
Subject: [lit-ideas] Bridges of Madison County
At 04:43 PM 1/26/2006, you wrote:
I'd love somebody to tell me what was so great about that movie.
have you ever been trapped in a boring life?
Andy: Welcome to the real world. Everybody's life is "boring". Boredom is a
state of mind, not circumstances.
have you ever fallen in love instantly with a stranger?
Andy: Well, actually I did once. After that I began to believe in love at
first sight. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately), I was married at the time
and didn't act on it. The strange part was that it wasn't even necessarily a
sexual thing with him, it was just this strangest desire to simply be with him.
It was a very powerful feeling. And weird. I looked at him, and there it
was, this amazing feeling. He was a sales rep in a company I worked for, from
the West Coast. I never saw him again even though we talked on the phone. I
never said anything, and he never said anything. I always wondered if he felt
what I had felt. Needless to say I did not act on it, but it was almost a
supernatural thing. It was like fastforwarding from in love to love in a split
second. Maybe he was from another dimension, I don't know.
have you ever forgone that love with bitter emotion?
Andy: Not bitter emotion, no. I love what I have.
have you ever followed through with an affair with lovely and terrible results?
ever thought about it?
Andy: See above. Lovely and terrible results, in that order I would assume.
The state of being "in love" is by definition temporary. It cannot last. Not
will not last, but *cannot* last. Before I acquired all this information
regarding what makes humans (read: me) tick, I too didn't know that. Except
that crazy time with that sales rep. That fits no category.
have you ever been treated to something completely different than your family,
something which you felt incredible about and STILL made the choice to keep
your family?
Andy: I made and make that choice on a daily basis by default.
have you ever, many years later thought about any of these things?
Andy: I think another way to phrase that is to ask if I've ever been stuck in
the past. I would answer that but Brother Philbert will get upset that I'm
talking about myself too much. Generally, though, living in the past is not a
happy condition.
have you ever been so conflicted emotionally that you couldn't think?
Andy: I'm always conflicted. You've been reading my posts. You know I can't
think (just kidding). Actually, I've learned that one deals with emotions
emotionally, not by chasing after fantasies. Fantasies are fantasies, not
real, don't exist. In my opinion, living a fantasy is like being on drugs.
Not exactly the same, but it fills a void.
have you ever had an unrequited love?
Andy: An unrequited love is fantasy. It's chasing after something unreal.
Have I done it? Probably. Everybody has. But now I know better and don't
want what's unreal.
have you ever fallen in love with a person you've never met?
Andy: I think that's almost the definition of being "in love". Being in love
is with people we don't know. Once we find out who that person is, the "in
love" goes away and hopefully love, or, just as good or even better, "like"
sets in. The movie When Harry Met Sally is much more my style.
have you ever thought a sad thought because there are only so many people in
the world and when you meet them, sometimes, you just can't?
Andy: I don't quite understand this question. From what I think I understand,
I sense there's an expectation of the self here that's too high. That's the
nice thing about a good relationship. We can be who we are. But, it has to be
a relationship, not a fantasy. We can't (as you say) with a fantasy, we can
with a real person.
have you ever felt content in your life and STILL wondered what you're missing?
Andy: No. I'm one of those people who will die of a broken heart when my
spouse dies. I think what you're talking about is excitement. I think we need
to define excitement. What is excitement, and what does it mean to you?
Oh, and it's about bridges, photography, meryl streep with yet another accent,
clint as yet another man's man...
Sure it's slow and plodding, but so was their uncomfortable, wonderful week
together.
Andy: Uncomfortable and wonderful. Maybe that's the definition of excitement?
Sort of like lovely and terrible. Those words don't seem to go together. I
like the song. Uncomfortable and wonderful might describe it.
paul
p.s. here's a song from a relatively new songster named James Blunt
You're Beautiful"
My life is brilliant.
My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got a plan.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
Fucking high,
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.
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