"This Just In" "In cooperation with Interpol, FBI has announced a massive roundup of a Japanese organized crime syndicate. They had local operations throughout the globe." "Named for the minimalist poetry for which Japan is reknowned, Haiku was on the verge of bankrupting two of the United States' largest and most-successful companies: Microsoft and Apple." "Fortunately, all of their computers were impounded and their criminally-inspired software was seized before real damage could be done." "Back to you, Jim."