[guide.chat]

  • From: "harold kitching" <harold.kitching01@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: "guide chat" <guide.chat@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • Date: Thu, 16 Aug 2012 11:02:45 +0100

An older couple is lying in bed one morning. 
They had just awakened from a good night's sleep 
He takes her hand and she responds, 'Don't touch me. ' 
'Why not?' he asked. 
She answered, 'Because I'm dead.' 

The husband asked...'What are you talking about? We're both lying here in
bed together and talking to one another!' 
She said, 'No, I'm definitely dead.' 
He insisted, 'You are not dead. What in the world makes you think you're
dead?' 

'Because I woke up this morning and nothing hurts.' 

Remember... 
Once you get over the hill, you'll begin to pick up speed . 

.

If it weren't for STRESS 
I'd have no energy at all. 
                  Whatever hits the fan...

       
Will Not Be Evenly Distributed. 

Everyone has a photographic memory.
Some, like me, just don't have any film. 
  
I always know... 
God won't give me more than I can handle 
There are times I just wish He didn't trust me quite so much . 
 

Dogs Have Owners ~ Cats Have Staff

 

Never be too open-minded, your brains may fall out. 

Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian . 
Not any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.   

A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand. 

Middle age is when broadness of the mind 
And narrowness of the waist change places. 

Opportunities always look bigger going than coming. 

Junk is something you've kept for years 
And throw away three weeks before you need it. 

By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends. 

Learn from the mistakes of others.
Trust me... You can't live long enough to make them all yourself. 
I've tried!! 
 

HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY. 
    Hold your loved ones close, tell them you love them, for if tomorrow
never comes, you'll have no regrets about today!

 

 

  

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