Why I Fired My Secretary Hi Scot many thanks for all of the funny ditties that you have put onto the chat line ,I am gradually getting through the 178 emails that were in my computer when I got back from my holiday ,I still have not read all of them yet but somewhere I think I heard that you had not had any messages was this MSN or skype ones ,I did not know that you were on skype if I had known then I would have sent you a skype call rather than wasting time typing emails too you as I am not much good at this ,anyway I think you have a fan ,have you a fan club ,if so ,you should put it into the chat club as seventy five of all the emails so far in my received emails came from you ,please take this as a complement as I know that as you read this you will think I am taking the p but it is the way my writing is ,I had better stop now or I will dig a big hole for myself and say something that I did not mean to say ,so Scot keep on sending all of the emails even though you do go on a bit ,I'm sure you mean well . Best Wishes Keith -----Original Message----- From: Scott C - Email Address: castledine10@xxxxxxxxxxxxxx Sent On: 04/09/2009 12:56 Sent To: guide.chat@xxxxxxxxxxxxx - Email Address: guide.chat@xxxxxxxxxxxxx Subject: [guide.chat] Why I Fired My Secretary Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up that morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy birthday!", and possibly have a present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy birthday". I thought. well, that's marriage for you, but the kids will remember. My kids ate breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and somewhat despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary, Jane said, "Good morning boss, happy birthday!" It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered. I worked until one o'clock and then Jane knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your birthday, let's go out to lunch, just you and me". I said, "Thanks Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go!" We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go. We dined instead at a little place with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?" I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in mind?" She said, "Let's go to my apartment". After arriving at her apartment Jane turned to me and said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for a moment. I'll be right back". "OK", I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake. followed by my wife, kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing "Happy Birthday". And I just sat there. On the couch. Naked.