<USS Avalon> Talea Seeks Counsel
- From: CmdrSkyler@xxxxxxx
- To: avalon@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
- Date: Wed, 11 Jul 2007 06:36:23 EDT
Talea Seeks Counsel
by
Dr. Alexis Cazook
Ensign Talea Genot Erridim
Sickbay, psionically-shielded room
------
As the Captain departed after the phaser-power alarm sounded, Talea tried to
relax for a bit, but realized her mind was troubled. Hoping the doctor
could help and had time to do so, she tapped the comunit on. "Erridim to
Cazook.
Sorry to bother you, ma'am, but I could use some advice." She then tapped
the unit off, suspecting Alexis would respond by coming to her, which was her
intent and need.
Hearing the alarm had startled Alexis, and she wondered if there would be
incoming wounded. To this end, she had started to prepare sickbay when she was
paged by Talea. "I will be right with you, dear." Putting down her supplies,
Alexis walked across the main sickbay to the psionically-shielded room and
knocked. She didn't want to just walk in and intrude on Talea's privacy. Lord
knows she was just starting to trust her.
Talea chuckled softly, as she expected the doctor was being cautious.
"Enter, Doctor. I am dressed properly." She used that rather than the "I'm
decent!" she had heard from others in the past, only to discover they were
not
clothed after all. She was not entirely certain she wasn't distracting the
doctor from duty, in fact, and felt a little guilty because of that
uncertainty.
Pausing momentarily, Alexis entered the room. She found Talea sitting on
the edge of the bed. Walking over to the nearest chair, she sat and tried to
make herself comfortable. "How are you doing, Talea? Having any bad
flashbacks or anything of that nature?"
Talea chuckled. "Not exactly. The real problem is just that there are
essential differences in the regulations the Starfleet Marines and Starfleet
follow. The same is true, although to a lesser extent, between the RSDF and
RSMC." Her face showed her concern. "How to properly explain this,
especially
if what I fear has happened has truly happened, and one or more of those who
assaulted me are now dead?" She got off the bed and crossed back to the
conversation area, settling in the lesser of the two chairs. "To make matters
worse, I fear I may have disrupted your duties by this call. That is unjust
on
my part, especially if you get in trouble because of me."
"I have yet to be called to the scene of any disturbance. I will admit that
the alarm going off did startle me. One doesn't expect phaser fire on their
own ship." Taking off her bifocals and letting them hang by their chain,
Alexis rubbed her eyes. "Nothing you have done is wrong or unjust. If, and
that is a big if, someone was killed, I am sure someone has a good reason,
although I don't think the Captain is going to agree with it. I don't know
anything about Marine regulations and such, but I do know that Captain Skyler
isn't going to tolerate anyone taking the law into their own hands. Just as
she
hasn't tolerated the way you have been treated."
Talea nodded. "There is the risk that certain actions legal to Captain
Phillips, should he have taken them, will be taken as his having acted as a
vigilante, when in fact, his actions probably are quite legal, if somewhat
irregular, in both Starfleet's Marine Corps and the Regellian Space Marine
Corps.
For example, he could easily have considered the actions of the man who
actually engaged me in the Pit as dishonorable and even, perhaps, treasonous.
Under the regulations of both the SFMC and RSMC, he would be within his rights
as
company commander to deal with the issue with High Justice, if he believed
it necessary, although the relevant regulations are flagged as "wartime-only"
in the RSMC. One of the things I was briefed on before I was permitted to
come here was the regulations of Starfleet and the differences between them
and
Regellian regulations dealing with the same issues." She shrugged.
"Familiarity of that level doesn't make me a legal expert by any stretch, of
course."
She sighed. "This whole situation has me so very frightened, since I don't
know enough, yet I know too much. I don't know who fired the illegally-set
phaser, nor at whom, only the likelihood of someone having died!"
Standing, Alexis moved over to the ensign before her. She put her arms
around her and whispered, "It's alright to cry. There is nothing for you to
be
frightened of. You have done nothing wrong, nor are you the cause of whatever
has happened. I am sure we will find out soon enough what happened. Until
then, there is no point in getting all worked up about something you have no
control over." She couldn't help but wonder herself what had happened and
more to the point . . . why?
Talea sighed, then shook her head. "In a way, I was the reason whatever
happened has. Had the fight not occurred . . ." She was trying to regain her
composure, and failing badly.
"Talea, my dear. Whatever happened was not caused by you. Even if it was
remotely related to what happened to you, doesn't mean you caused it.
Whoever shot that phaser did it of their own volition. As we humans say,
'There is
no point in crying over spilt milk'."
Talea wasn't quite buying into that, not quite yet. "Crying over events one
has no control over, aye, that is pointless. The fact still remains that
had I been more alert and escaped before being thrown into that infernal ring,
none of this would have happened, but I wasn't as alert as I should have
been. That, Doctor, with all due respect, was my fault." She shrugged,
feeling
helpless now. "I suppose it's just as well. Who knows but that whatever
happened has saved Starfleet a great deal of effort, trouble and credits?
Lords
know that the fighter was in the wrong, as were those who participated
directly and indirectly in the plot to harm me. Still, if those directly
involved
are punished, I can easily forgive those who got coerced or deceived into
participating."
"You need to quit punishing yourself for something you had no control over.
Did you send the message to yourself and forge Walker's code? Did you go to
the Pit, knowing what was going to happen? I rather think not. Therefore you
cannot be held responsible for the actions of a few, and I do mean a few,
men." Alexis didn't know how she was going to convince Talea none of what
happened was her fault. Either previously or recently.
Talea sighed. "The PADD only showed his first name. There was no proof,
such as the audio code you heard earlier. Nor was there visual evidence the
message was authentic. That's why I feel I was at fault. I trusted an
unauthenticated message was legitimate. I believe you can now understand my
distress over this whole matter."
Sighing, Alexis just sat there. "I can see how you might consider yourself
to be at fault. However, you did not send the message. You just accepted
that it was from Walker, as would anyone else in that situation. I do
understand your distress. However again, whatever has happened is not your
fault.
You are not back amongst your clan where whatever you thought or did was
wrong and you were punished for it. You need to try and get that thinking out
of
your mindset."
Talea started laughing as a very Terran saying came to mind. Waving a hand
in an effort to put off Alexis' possible affront, she then explained, "You
mean, 'When in Rome, act as the Romans do.'?" Of course, she suspected this
was the wrong saying, but it was, perversely, the one that had come to mind.
Sighing, Alexis shook her head. "No, that is not what I mean. I mean you
need to forget about what would or could have happened in your clan and
realize
that you are no longer in that situation. You are not amongst a group of
Neanderthals, other than those in the brig." She didn't know how or if she
would
be able to get through to Talea.
Talea was very much aware now what the doctor had been getting at, so
frowned slightly before responding. "I see I slightly misunderstood, Doctor.
Of
course I am not amongst those of my Clan here, a fact for which I thank the
Creator. I am indeed attempting to get past the problems my Clan has caused
me, but it will take time. After all, (to pose a situation that you are
doubtless familiar with) weight-gain can happen gradually, over the course of
years, and the battle to return to one's proper weight can take years as well.
So
too seems to be my struggle to return to normal after the emotional and
mental trauma of my childhood, save the fact that I am not totally certain
what
normalcy is, in this case." She smiled slightly wistfully. "That is one
reason I must depend on others to help me get past this. Others who, at least
in
theory, know what normal should be for someone like me."
Nodding, Alexis agreed. "That is very true. To be back at a younger weight
would make me quite happy. Alas, I don't think it is going to happen.
However, that is not the problem we are discussing. The Captain and I are
more
than willing to help you overcome this problem. It won't be easy for any of
us, but it can be done. You also have to remember that what may be normal for
one person, even in that clan of yours, may not be your normal. Everyone is
different in their own way. That is what makes us unique and interesting."
Taking a deep breath Alexis dared to broach a tender subject. "What we
really need to do now is to get you somewhat comfortable with a male figure
who
is in charge. As I understand it, the Admiral will be returning to the ship
very soon. I don't think he would approve of having an Ops officer who
couldn't stand to be near him. To that end, I may have a solution of sorts.
If
you are up to it, that is."
Talea wanted to cheer and look extremely puzzled at one and the same time,
so did neither. Rather, she asked a very pertinent set of related questions
of the doctor. "What sort of solution, Doctor? I am very much aware of my
difficulty with men in general. However, I wish to remind you that those whom
I already trust can vouch for someone I've not interacted with before and
generally, I believe their word." She smiled slightly sadly. "Of course I am
somewhat apprehensive about this, but without trust in anyone, what is the
point in me continuing aboard this vessel, or indeed, of me living? Life
without trust or hope is rather pointless, isn't it?"
"First of all, let's get that thinking out of your head. You need to start
thinking more positively. As for what I had in mind, it is really quite
simple. A holodeck program. A program that will allow you to get to know the
Admiral or any other man you wish without the threat of anything actually
happening. It would be a safe and controlled environment that you would
control.
If you wish, I could be there with you."
Talea nodded. "I shall consider this, Doctor. I have the unsettling
feeling we will be quite busy soon. I cannot explain the reasoning, for I do
not
fully understand it myself." She then smiled slightly. "In the meantime, if
I am not being overly bold, I expect you've duties and obligations to see to.
I am but one person, and not your only responsibility."
Looking at Talea, Alexis shrugged. "Actually, right now I am not busy, and
yes, you are my only responsibility at the moment. However, I get the
feeling you would like to end this conversation, so I will leave you to do
your
thinking. Just remember I am but a page away." With that said, Alexis turned
and left the shielded room full of questions with few answers.
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