[austechwriter] Job ad of the year - shame about the rate.

  • From: Michael Edward Granat <megranat@xxxxxxxx>
  • To: austechwriter@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Date: Tue, 22 Jul 2003 22:55:48 +1000

Dear All,

Had to copy and paste as the job (formerly @=20
<http://it.seek.com.au/users/ViewDetails.asp?JobListAction=3DViewOneAd&AdID=
=3D2810116&apt=3Dtrue>)=20
has just (seconds ago) been withdrawn by Seek, with the message of "Sorry.=
=20
The advertiser has recently removed this position.".

Enjoy, but don't apply!

Cheers,

Michael Granat
Write Ideas

P.S.  My thanks to Danny G. (no relation) for sending me the link and to=20
Ian H. for the "removed" feedback.

>IT Resources Group (logo)
>Web Developer
>So you were a top Web Developer, once, many years ago, until the=20
>=93correction=94. Now nobody cares and you are shunned in public, much as=
=20
>lepers were in the fifteenth century. Your modern-day equivalent of the=20
>chiming bell and vile burbling exclamations of =93Unclean! Unclean!=94 is=
 the=20
>obnoxious ringtone on your expensive mobile. There=92s a good chance you=20
>listen to either Sisters of Mercy and Bauhaus or elaborate Paul Oakenfold=
=20
>remixes, with a bit of bootlegged Chemical Brothers thrown in for good=20
>measure. Maybe you find yourself missing the ashtray completely, and your=
=20
>ESC through F3 keys are thoroughly clogged up with burned, cancerous grey=
=20
>flakes. For better or for worse, you=92re familiar with such repugnant=20
>images as goatse.cx and know what STFU means. In all probability your=20
>beverage of choice is Jolt/Columbian Cola, and you have the weeping=20
>stomach ulcers to prove it. You give copies of Photoshop 7.0 to your=20
>friends, thereby depriving a fat CEO somewhere of a heated driveway. You=20
>have a world-crushing collection of MP3s. Your author of choice: Neal=20
>Stephenson or William Gibson. You have every volume of Gaiman=92s Sandman=
=20
>series, though you decided after Volume III that it`s all a bit of a wank.=
=20
>Sometimes, you pretend you are in The Matrix. Your half-elf mage/rogue is=
=20
>at Level 9, and has actually worked out how to put a Bag of Holding within=
=20
>another Bag of Holding without imploding Ravenloft. You can pronounce=20
>"Urotsukidoji" without hurting yourself, and can rocket-jump better than=20
>anyone you know. You have a bit of an attitude when it comes to Windows=20
>XP, and you like to recompile kernels.
>
>Your spine looks like a u-bend.
>
>Others may call you freakish. We call you lovely. And in reward for your=20
>loveliness, we would like to offer you this mildly exciting opportunity,=20
>if your idea of excitement is a RAM upgrade:
>
>This is a fun little two week contract for a reasonably experienced Web=20
>Developer with plenty of HTML (well, duh), JavaScript and ASP know-how.=20
>Ideally you will also be fluent in the, and I quote, =93uploading of ASP=20
>pages from a SAP business connector=94. I said that out loud and=20
>Shub-Niggurath appeared and attempted to devour my soul through some=20
>impressive shambling and ominous tentacle-writhing, so I won=92t=
 investigate=20
>it any further.
>
>But anyway, that=92s the deal. Either you like it or you don=92t, and we=92=
re=20
>not about to tell you either way. It=92s a two week contract for a company=
=20
>here in the city, and will probably be paying about $25 per hour,=20
>commensurate with experience. So apply now (or don=92t), or call Gary=20
>Fernandes for more information.
>Please contact Gary Fernandes quoting reference number SK/GFWD on:
>phone (03) 9629 6788 =95 fax (03) 9629 5788
>Email: Please click the 'Apply Now' button below.

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