<USS Banshee> Looking for Answers

  • From: EnsnSaraCrusher@xxxxxxx
  • To: ussbanshee@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Date: Mon, 17 Mar 2003 01:08:33 EST

"Looking for Answers" 
By Lt. Sara Crusher.. 

Sara walked quietly into the bedroom leaving Cyanah and Ms. Morrigan sitting 
on the couch talking. Her mind was a haze of images and thoughts. The strange 
conversation with the kind old Irish woman danced amount the images she couldn
’t place, which only made things more confusing. How did Ms. Morrigan know 
her? Why had she called her Nana? How’d she know her full name? And why had 
she told her that she hadn’t been to Ireland since she was young? She’s 
never been to Ireland.. Had she?  

Moving though the room towards the closet Sara couldn’t keep her mind on 
anything else. It was becoming clear to her that for some unexplained reason 
she had forgotten an entire part of her life. But why? She shook off the 
"lost in a fog" feeling and pulled a long brown suede skirt, a white lace 
button up blouse, and her favorite pair of knee high boots from the closet. 
She lied them on the bed and then disappeared into the bathroom. 

Not even a hot shower was able to clear her mind. As she got dressed for her 
evening out with Cyanah she tried to clear her mind hoping that either the 
answers she was lookin for would come to her or that she’d be able to push 
the last hour, the few weeks, to the back of her mind so she could enjoy her 
time with Cyanah. Sara sat at the vanity and sighed.  She couldn’t help but 
wonder what it was she was blocking out and why she was blocking it. She 
shook her head and for a split moment thought to herself "Because it hurts to 

Sara looked up and stared at her reflection. What hurts to remember? She 
shook her head again and then pinched the bridge of her nose hoping to 
relieve the headache she was getting. Picking the hair brush up from the 
table Sara started to brush out her mid-length red hair and as she did so, 
with out realizing she was doing it, Sara started to hum softly. The song was 
one she had always carried around in her memory but could never place. Her 
mother wasn’t very musical. In fact, Stephanie Crusher couldn’t carry a 
in a bucket, so where did this song come from?. Sara closed her eyes as she 
began to braid her hair, she focused on the humming and in a blink of an eye 
another memory sufficed. 

She sat on a small wooden stool in front of an old stone fireplace. She was 
small, probably eight or nine. There was a small figure and other trinkets on 
the mantel of the fire place. Cast iron pokers, a black kettle and a bronze 
tea pot sat on it’s hearth. And above it was a beautiful panting of the sea, 
a stone wall, and a dark haired woman. Sara stared up at that painting until 
she felt a cool breeze brush against her bare legs. She turned her head to 
the side and there though an open window she saw the stone wall and beyond 
that the sea. Then a pair of soft hands turned her head back so she was 
facing forward again. That’s when she noticed someone was behind her. A woman 
from the sound of the soft humming. She was brushing and braiding Sara’s 

An intense feeling of security, happiness, and well being washed over Sara as 
she allowed the memory to fade away. She blinked several times before 
allowing herself to believe that it was real and not something she had seen 
in a Maureen O’Hara movie. She stood and walked over to the set of double 
doors that lead out into the sitting room. She reached for the door knob with 
ever intension of storming in there and demanding that Ms. Kathryn Ann 
Morrigan explain how she knew such things about her. But as her hand came 
into contact with the cool brass she stopped, instead of storming in she 
stood there. She moved the lace curtain that covered the glass panels that 
made up most of the door and watched the two red headed women who sat on the 
couch. Ms. Morrigan was right, she needed to give what ever it was she was 
blocking time to come back on it’s own. 

Sara sighed deeply as she took the extra pillow and blanket from the chest at 
the end of the bed. She clutched them both tight and once again headed for 
the door. Once again she stopped. She turned slowly and looked at the chest 
she had just gotten the items she was taken to Ms. Morrigan so she could nap 
on the couch. Then it hit her like a ton of brinks falling from the sky. She 
knew where to look for some answers. After placing the pillow and blanket on 
the bed, Sara walked over to the rooms vid-screen. She accessed an out side 
line and with in minutes was looking at a familiar face. 

At least I remember her! Sara thought to herself as she smiled at the image 
of an old family friend. "Rosa! It’s wonderful to see you!" 

The old Hispanic woman smiled back. "Your looking well, Sara." 

"Rosa.. I need to ask you a favor." Rosa had been friends with her mother for 
nearly thirty years. She had started as the house keeper but soon became part 
of the family. Even after she and her husband opened the cantina, Rosa 
remained with her mother. 

"Anything, Sara.. What do you need?" 

Sara smiled. "Do you know if my mom kept my old seder truck?" 

Rosa laughed. It was a hearty laugh that could come only from a woman of many 
well rounded years. "Of course she keep it. You mother keeps everything!" 

"Wonderful!" Sara chirped. "Can you have it sent to my ship. We’re in orbit 
over Earth and all you have to do is make arrangements with.." Sara paused to 
think about who on the ship would be responsible for that.. "Lt. Macalister. I
’ll send word to expect it."  

"It’ll be there." Rosa then paused and Sara could tell she had put her hands 
on her hips. "Your here and didn’t come home?" 

Sara’s face turned a bright red. "Next time I promise. I‘m dieing for 
everyone to meet someone." She smiled warmly when Rosa nodded. 

After saying their goodbyes and Sara promising once again to come home the 
next time she was on Earth the call was ended. Sara remained seated on the 
edge of the bed with a sense of anticipation, excitement and even a little 
fear as she thought about what she might find in the chest in which she kept 
mementoes of her life. 

Sara didn’t notice movement on the bed behind her until a pair of arms 
wrapped themselves around her. Sara smiled and rested her head against Cyanah’
s chest. She could sense the concern Cyanah had for her and as she reached up 
to place her hand on Cyanah’s she closed her eyes and relaxed. She allowed 
Cyanah to feel what she was feeling. "I’m a little dazed and very confused, 
but I’ll be ok." She told her. Cyanah hugged her tightly. "Now it’s you 
to get dressed. I’m going to take these things out to Ms. Morrigan and tell 
her more about the Captain." Cyanah released Sara and Sara in turn kissed her 
before going back out into the sitting room. 

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