Drunken Pain Telsia moved out of her office, luckily not noticed by Josh. She walked quickly back to her quarters, not even bothering to try and hide her tear stained face from those that she passed. Stepping into the doors to the place that she lived in with Josh and Cameron, Tel fell back against the door and let out a small sob. She felt weak and pathetic. It was her fault that Josh was going through the trouble and turmoil that he was currently dealing with. If only she hadn?t talked to Sara and told her about Josh, maybe he wouldn?t have looked at her with such anger in his eyes. Josh seemed to have truly hated Tel at that moment when he had walked into sickbay, following Sara. Sara was such a wonderful boss, so wonderful that she had let Tel off early, so that she could be with her son and hopefully not think about Josh. Though, it was impossible to not think about Josh when looking at Cameron, he was the spitting image of his father. Thinking of her child, Telsia forced herself away from the wall and moved into Cameron?s bedroom. The walls were painted light blue, with images of cowboys along the top of the wall. Cameron was lying in his crib, in the same place as when Tel had left for work. She walked over to his crib and reached her hand down inside, resting it against her sleeping son?s head. Telsia always felt at peace if she was near Cameron. Back when Tel had been married to Eric, she found herself going into Cameron?s room every night and just sitting next to his crib or holding him. It didn?t matter what Eric would do to her, she would just go to Cameron and all the troubles in her world seemed to diminish at the sight of the child she had with Josh. Of course, even while Cameron was making her feel better, at the same time he was slowly breaking her heart. Looking at him just made her think about Josh and thinking about Josh brought up all the emotions that were currently running through her. She couldn?t get the image of the look on Josh?s face when he walked into sickbay and saw her standing there. For the first time, Cameron did not bring the peace to her heart that he normally did. Sighing, Tel walked back out of Cameron?s room and over to the replicator. Knowing it wasn?t a good idea but not caring, Telsia replicated a bottle of good wine and a glass. In dejection, she moved slowly across the quarters she shared with her lover and laid down on the couch. Uncorking the bottle, she poured some wine into her glass and began to slowly drink it. Eyes closed and glass in hand, Tel tried her hardest to forget the past few weeks and relax her body. ?If only I could know that Josh didn?t hate me,? she thought to herself as she felt the wine start to take effect and her eyes grew heavy. It didn?t take to long before the bottle of wine was empty and Telsia was asleep on the living room couch. ________________________________________________________________ The best thing to hit the Internet in years - Juno SpeedBand! Surf the Web up to FIVE TIMES FASTER! Only $14.95/ month - visit www.juno.com to sign up today!