Yup, that's me and bears repeatin', a Yankee scholar and a Southern gentleman, which translated means a northern born child wot dun been down south fer a loooooong spell! .......clarence....... > Only a true Southerner knows.... > > *Only a true Southerner knows the difference between a > hissie fit and a conniption and that you don't "have" > them, but "pitch" them. > > * Nobody but a true Southerner knows how many fish, > collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc. make > up a mess. > > * A true Southerner can show or point out to you the > general direction of "yonder." > > * A true Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" > is - as in "Going to town, be back directly." > > * Even true Southern babies know that "Gimme some > sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet > substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the > middle of the table. > > * All true Southerners know exactly when "by and by" > is. They might not use the term, but they know the > concept well. > > * True Southerners know instinctively that the best > gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a > plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold > potato salad. (If the trouble is a real crisis, they > also know to add a large banana puddin'.) > > * True Southerners grow up knowing the difference > between "right near" and "a right far piece." They know > that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20. > > * True Southerners both know and understand the > differences between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' > white trash. > > * No true Southerner would ever assume that the car > with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make > a turn. > > * True Southerners know that "fixin" can be used both > as a noun, verb and adverb. > > * True Southerners make friends standing in lines. We > don't do "queues," we do "lines." We stand IN them, not > ON them. And when we're in line, we talk to everybody. > Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will > discover they're related, if only by marriage. > > * True Southerners never refer to one person as "y'all." > > * True Southerners know grits come from corn and how to > eat them. > > * Every true Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, > bacon, grits and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that > redeye gravy is also a breakfast food; that fried green > tomatoes are not breakfast food. > > * Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet > tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it - we do > not like our tea unsweetened; "sweet milk" means you > don't want buttermilk. > > * And a true Southerner knows you don't scream > obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 on the > freeway - you say, "Bless her heart" and go your way. VIEW ARCHIVES @ //www.freelists.org UNSUBSCRIBE by sending email to triadtechtalk-request@xxxxxxxxxxxxx with unsubscribe in the Subject field. To VIEW/CHANGE your subscription status go to //www.freelists.org/webpage/triadtechtalk Contact List Owner - dbcfour@xxxxxxx