Welcome to The Big Jewel, where we are never out of creative new ways to sell rotten old garbage. This week Dirk Voetberg returns with an internal memo that is guaranteed to raise morale around the office: We Need Some Fresh Ideas Here at Ramming One's Head into Sculptures at Full Speed, Inc. By Dirk Voetberg Team, As you know, we here at Ramming One's Head into Sculptures at Full Speed, Inc., have experienced fifty-eight straight quarters of declining revenue. Well, I was hired as your new VP of Marketing to snap that slump! But I know that we can only do it as a team! So I'm calling out to each and every one of you to contribute whatever marketing suggestions you have. Come on by! My door's always open! And, remember, there's no such thing as a bad idea! I mean that!... For the full article please visit http://www.thebigjewel.com To unsubscribe from The Big Jewel's Hilarious Weekly Email please send an email with the word UNSUBSCRIBE in the subject line to neilpasricha@xxxxxxxxx